My mom wants to revoke my POA. Should I let her fall down the rabbit hole of financial ruin?

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aj6044 Asked August 2018

My mom wants to revoke my POA. Should I let her fall down the rabbit hole of financial ruin?

I use my mom's POA to make sure she uses her money well and is living well. Well, I guess I cared too much and tried to find her temporary nursing home placement so she could get PT and OT so she could live AT HOME more independently.

Anyways, she hired a lawyer to revoke my POA. She is too sharp to be deemed incompetent or to get guardianship, and I do not want guardianship or conservatorship. Should I be scared that I'm going to have to clean up a big mess later, or should I let her fall down the rabbit hole of financial ruin until she comes crying for my help again?

The idea of being free from all this POA responsibility doesn't make me feel good knowing my mom is just going to screw herself over.

Mind you my mom hasn't managed her own finances in over a year, relied on me to find her a new apartment, AND just told me a few days ago that she appreciates all I've done.

OH and I surrendered an internship to move home and be closer to her. And now I'm stuck here with a 1 year lease.

Financial Planning Power of Attorney (POA)

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score 0 · Answer 1

Oh, so sorry. Are you living with ur parents? I guess you r just going to let Mom fall. I also would tell her when that time comes, you can't help her financially.

There will be others chiming in.

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score 0 · Answer 2

I have followed your story for the brief time I have been on this site. I thought you were also dealing with your father. I have sympathized with some of your issues feeling that I share some of them. Why is your mother taking this position now? Can you reason with her at all and indicate all you have done and why you acting as her POA is in her best interests?

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score 1 · Answer 3

Deep down, aj, only you can answer this. Have you had enough? It is certainly understandable if you have. If your mom is so very determined to revoke your POA that she has actually hired an attorney, I wouldn’t fight it. She obviously sees your trying to help as interference. You set up an apartment. She said no. Then she said yes. How much more of this are you willing to put up with before you start to wonder what’s wrong with you that you tolerate all this and keep on trying to help her? It’s like trying to force a little kid to eat Brussels sprouts. Be done. Live out your year’s lease or see if your landlord will let you sublet. Get out. Go live your life. See if you can still get the internship. She doesn’t want your help. I don’t think she knows what the heck she wants. She had a good thing and she turned it down. Hired an attorney, huh? Wow.

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My mom wants to revoke my POA. Should I let her fall down the rabbit hole of financial ruin?

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