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BuzzyBee Asked August 2018

How do I get my husband registered as my Carer?

I am in England UK. I have finally accepted I need help. My breathing is at 1/3 normal (C.O.P.D.)


I have mobility problems, also stomach and bowel problems. I am NOT registered as disabled, as I did not think I was. Now I am not so sure.


He has to do more and more for me physically.


He also has C.O.P.D. and diabetes. But he is mobile. He suffers a little with forgetfulness.


I am 72 he is 76.


Please advise.


Thank you.


Was not sure which topic to put this under.

Countrymouse Aug 2018
PS - if you're having a crisis, don't wait 'til Monday. Actually Tuesday - it's a bank holiday weekend! It could prove a false economy of time. Anything specific you need help with? Don't forget walk-in centres and your GP's out of hours service; there should also be a community nursing team if you can't get out of the house.

Countrymouse Aug 2018
Remember: nobody, be he ne'er so well qualified, can stick a needle in you without your specific informed consent. Don't let anxiety about what might be proposed stop you finding out what is possible.

The British Lung Foundation has lots of ideas, some of which you may find extremely irritating but others of real use. Try: https://www.blf.org.uk/support-for-you/copd/treatment/managing-my-copd

There may be an Expert Patients Programme for COPD in your area. The idea of these EPPs is to harness the experience and knowledge of the people who really do know what they're talking about - i.e. long term patients - and feed it into their areas' healthcare structure; so as well as gaining a support group you might have a lot to offer those others you reckon need more help than you do :)

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BuzzyBee Aug 2018
Thank you CM. :)
So much to take in.
I do go to an ear clinic every 3/4 months (forgot to mention my ears. lol)
A chiropodist every 5 weeks.
But last time I was at my doctors, I told them I did not want any thing invasive or intrusive. I try and do all my doctors appointments by phone or on-line. And I admit I underplay them.
I have had the usual x.rays and ultra scans and Spirometry tests.

But had said that I just want to be comfortable, not a pin cushion or a guinea pig.

Saying all of that, I still dont want to be poked and prodded but sadly we need help now.

Thank you so much for your help, I will start the phone calls Monday (when they are open)
I will let you know if I get some help or not. It is ironic, I can fight for everyone except myself, as I honestly do not think I am worth bothering with. There are so many people a lot worse off that me that need help first.

Love
Buzzy

Countrymouse Aug 2018
Hi Buzzy.

The quickest and simplest start would be through your local authority. Go to the social services for adults section, look for their main contact number and give them a call. They will be able to advise you about all kinds of support and benefits and resources for both of you. At the very least, make a formal request for a Carer's Assessment. This is a legal entitlement and in theory they must carry it out within x weeks; but how quickly they actually get round to it kind of depends on how the public sector is doing in your neck of the woods.

They will probably put you onto your local branch of CarersUK. You should join. Not because they'll come rushing round to help with the ironing or anything useful like that, but because they will do sensible things like set up emergency contact networks - it's just another radar it's worth being on.

Your GP also needs to know that your husband is your primary carer. Just ring them up and tell them, and ask for him to be registered. It may go against the grain, but you may need to be a slightly squeakier wheel with them than you're used to being. If personal care is becoming a problem, say so and they might help gee social services up a bit. It all helps, but you need to speak up.

There are all kinds of reasons for doing these things and some of them are not obvious and won't be useful until they suddenly are. For example, your utilities providers will tag you as priority customers - and then if there ever is an outage or a problem, they'll deal with it quicker and more sympathetically.

Do you go to an outpatient clinic regularly?

BuzzyBee Aug 2018
Tried contacting her but no luck. I will look to a different site.

BuzzyBee Aug 2018
Thank you cwillie :)

JoAnn29 Aug 2018
Yes, we only have a couple of members from the UK. The US medical system is very different from the UK. Hopefully they will pipe in.

cwillie Aug 2018
I think Countrymouse is the only other person from the UK currently on the site (and very knowledgeable), you might try PMing her.

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