Loved one hired a consultant to assist. Consultant decided they are "best friends" & shares personal things. Boundaries & ethics?

Your profile says that you are caring for someone with ALZ/Dementia. Who hired a consultant and why?

It could be a good idea to be present for a session with both of them. Keep it chatty so that the ‘consultant’ acts in her normal way. She could be building up a personal relationship for financial reasons – commission, gifts, bequests. But she could be looking only for enough personal information to provide good advice, and using the strategy to encourage your mother to open up. Or your mother could be embroidering a bit – imagining an interesting back story for things that have been said. Perhaps you could make a friendly one-on-one meeting with the consultant, bring up things your mother has said, and at least try to get a gauge on whether your mother’s comments are correct.

If the person is a placement consultant, the relationship should be short. Unfortunately, it is not appropriate for it to be the start for a personal relationship. Yes, the situation is worth a few checks.

A consultant for what? In any case, consultants who work with Seniors to advise on home care, facility placement, etc. are supposed to be professional. They can certainly be friendly, but must maintain the consultant-client relationship. I would be very suspicious of a consultant who is a little too friendly. Can you be present with your LO when the consultant is there? Monitor the conversation and if it turns into a confession of sorts, pull the person aside and ask them to keep the relationship on a business level. It will be difficult because you did not hire and are not paying this person, but boundaries need to be set. If it continues, phone the agency the consultant works for and report them to the supervisor.