Sibling stress, any suggestions?

There are many businesses that simply can’t be operated by more than one sibling. Here it particularly applies to farms. There are professional ‘succession planners’ who help the family to negotiate the best way to go. The process covers the needs of the business, the abilities of the children, the financial issues involved, ways to compensate the children who don’t take the asset etc. There are nearly always personal stresses involved, for example between a daughter’s husband and a son who would both like to run the farm, or two sons who disagree about how it should be run (and all that obviously applies to other businesses besides farms). The process usually takes some time, often involves the bank manager, someone with a good knowledge of all the tax and duty implications, and a lawyer to document the agreements reached to make sure they stick. If your parents are no longer competent to alter their will, it is still possible to make post-will estate division agreements that bind the beneficiaries. Succession planning isn’t often cheap because it is a very skilled process, but it is nearly always a good investment, at least if there is a fair amount of money involved and a need for people to feel in the long term that they have been treated fairly.

I read once, don't tell anyone what your will says. The beneficiaries can be mad at you after you are gone and not before.

Its a shame when children fight over money they didn't make. People break their backs so they leave their children something. What they should have done was enjoy what they had not worrying about the kids. Sorry you are going thru this. Just step back and tell them ur not being part of the drama. That your energy is going towards your parents.

Somewhat similar - I told my dad that IF he and mom wanted to leave inheritance, then PLEASE do it so that it was cleancut and no sib cooperation/decision sharing was expected.  I've read of quite a few family businesses where the relationships among siblings are not taken into consideration, just financial issues in the business, or possibly tax issues.  Comes from having lawyers/bankers guide the decision, rather than psychologists.  "They'll all get along."  OH, Really?