Home can be her childhood home. I find that Dementia patients seem to go back in time. They forget spouses because in their minds they aren't married. Hence, no children either. My Dad didn't have Dementia but his last weeks he was in and out of reality. My daughter is an RN and was helping with him. He was not cooperating so my daughter, who was 30, PopPop its me Renee. He told her she couldn't be Renee because she was a little girl.
My Mom was told I was her daughter and she looked at the person like they were nuts. In her mind she had no children.
Like its been said on this forum time for little white lies.
As you no doubt have discovered, it does no good to try to convince her that she is at home. I tried that for months with my husband. It is a waste of time.
You might have better success going along with her and then redirecting her. "I understand, dear, and we will go home as soon as they finish with the sewer system upgrade. At least while we are waiting we have this nice place to stay. I think there is some ice cream in the freezer. Would you like me to fix us sundaes?"
If your wife seems to have a lot of anxiety discuss it with her doctor. Anxiety wasn't my husband's problem, though.
"Going home" may be a longing for the way things used to be. It may be a wish for a time when the world made sense and they felt safe in their surroundings. It may not be a literal desire to go to some particular place. They just don't know a more precise way to explain their discontent.
Taking care of a spouse with dementia is extremely challenging. If you like reading, I suggest the book "Loving Someone Who Has Dementia" by Pauline Boss. Also "Being Mortal" by Atul Gawande.
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My Mom was told I was her daughter and she looked at the person like they were nuts. In her mind she had no children.
Like its been said on this forum time for little white lies.
As you no doubt have discovered, it does no good to try to convince her that she is at home. I tried that for months with my husband. It is a waste of time.
You might have better success going along with her and then redirecting her. "I understand, dear, and we will go home as soon as they finish with the sewer system upgrade. At least while we are waiting we have this nice place to stay. I think there is some ice cream in the freezer. Would you like me to fix us sundaes?"
If your wife seems to have a lot of anxiety discuss it with her doctor. Anxiety wasn't my husband's problem, though.
"Going home" may be a longing for the way things used to be. It may be a wish for a time when the world made sense and they felt safe in their surroundings. It may not be a literal desire to go to some particular place. They just don't know a more precise way to explain their discontent.
Taking care of a spouse with dementia is extremely challenging. If you like reading, I suggest the book "Loving Someone Who Has Dementia" by Pauline Boss. Also "Being Mortal" by Atul Gawande.
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