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Lorraine12 Asked November 2018

Aunt has fallen 6 times in about 30 days. I want to get her on hospice but the nurse said they no longer have the same criteria. Any advice?

On Thanksgiveing she fell hard cracked a rib, now she's in severe pain.


I had her evaluated today the Nurse said they no longer have the same criteria as 2 years ago. My Aunt has Dementia pretty bad she has scoliosis in her spine, is so pathetic the bones protrude about 2 inches, there is no collegin left between her skin and bone so just skin over bone. On her left side the rib bones are almost non existing because her whole torso is deformed now. The right side has a cracked rib she's just recovering from cellulitis in her legs both of them and she only weighs 94 lbs.


Her dementia is progressed immensely to where she's screaming of night terrors and cannot seperate dreams from reality. This happens frequently at night and in the afternoon. Also this may go on for 7 days my aunt will ask where her mother is, and who will care for her now mom is gone. She thinks she walked here at times and tries to leave the house. She's so frail that no longer can open doors about 2 months ago she could slowly dress herself but now she screams help help help if we are not immediately in her sight to dress her or just maybe because shes scared ... every once and awhile my aunt will be sherp as a tack then slips away again.


I'm very concerned about her comfort and I REALLY REALLY WANT TO GET HER ON HOSPICE ...but its looking like maybe she'll only get Palliative care because aside from all of this my aunt is in pretty darn good health her B/P is 110 over 60 her oxygen is between 93 and 99 although shes sooo cold its hard to get a reading. I guess I'm venting because I feel that my Aunts numbers look good on paper but her FRAIL LITTLE BODY IS JUST DISCENGREATING RIGHT BEFORE OUR EYES and it seems to be happening more & more RAPIDLY. She just screams in pain when I put her to bed and when she's getting out of bed. I can't believe that Hospice has Changed so much in 2 years. I'm praying that the Dr. helps my aunt to get the Hospice care she needs & deserves ..this poor little lady needs the extra attention and pain management.


I am praying for my aunt she's in pain ..and I feel she Needs Hospice. THANK YOU ALL FOR YOUR SUPPORT !! I feel so much better after sharing with caregivers that are going through the same and more difficult situations than we are God Bless you all!!!

Lorraine12 Nov 2018
Oh by the way thank you for the ER advice you are sooo right !! I never thought of this ...the hospital ER will definatally take 1 look at her and do the right thing. Great thinking.....

Lorraine12 Nov 2018
Thanks to you all today I decided to change to a new Dr. thats more up to date in geriatric care hopefully he will help her a bit more .Yes I am pretty sure that I get the difference between pallitive care and Hospice what I got is pallitive care will come1 x per. Month... only a Nurse Practitioner will visit , 1x per month for comfort care ..hospice will have a nurse visit 1xper week a CNA visit up to 3xs per week, chaplin, music therapy ,social worker visits 1x per week they pay for all the incontinent supplies bathing ,,& creams?.,gloves , oxygen , new beds, chucks, diapers ,any and all equipment & no longer do they EVER have to leave to go to Dr. Because it all comes here & they have a unit at a nearby facility if shes so sick I can't take care of her anymore ,but I'll except Pallitive care if we can get hospice.....at least palliative care gets her foot in the door. And my Mom is actually giving helpful advice and sincerly feels so sorry for little frail Aunt I think anybody who could see aunties back and bent Torso could only feel empathy towards her! Today I hired a private caregiver to help to bath Aunt and it felt like such a relief not to have to be the person who always has to "torture her with a bath" aunties words!! Shes so afraid to fall and it is so hard to manuever her frail little body on the shower chair .I Am So Th as nkful for all of your good answers !! Im lucky to have found you all!!

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JoAnn29 Nov 2018
Hospice has not changed that much. I have a niece who is 46, who has a history of strokes. She leaves her house but still has Hospice check on her.

In your Aunts situation, I think Hospice is needed. Get her to a doctor to evaluate her. He can call in Hospice. Ask for a different one than evaluated, if possible. You also need her on meds for her night terrors. When you wake her up, make her open her eyes. I can go back into a dream if I don't open my eyes.

Or, call 911 and take her to the hospital. The doctors there can order hospice.

cwillie Nov 2018
I think you need to focus on finding a doctor who is better able to treat her night terrors and pain.

worriedinCali Nov 2018
I am pretty sure all things considered, at this point in your aunts life hospice and palliative care will both provide the same thing—comfort care. Palliative care means the goal is to keep her comfortable, to provide relief from all of her symptoms. I am curious if this was explained to you? Even with hospice cere, there is little “extra attention”. They will provide aids to bathe her. But there won’t be round the clock caregiving.

97yroldmom Nov 2018
Your aunt weighs the same as she is old. Amazing.
You are a lucky woman to have the grands and your DH to help out.
I’m so sorry your poor aunt is going through so much pain. It must be awful to witness.
I hope she is able to get extra help with her pain and her care and that your little spoiled mama will cut you some slack.

Isthisrealyreal Nov 2018
Pallitive care should provide pain management

Did you clarify what you could expect if this was the only option available at this time?

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