What do you do if person with dementia does not shower or wash and is going to visit people?

Have her take a bath. Or do what they call a spit bath. take a basin of water and wash one limb at a time. With My female client, I would wash her hair, dry and comb. then I would start with her upper torso, one side at a time, then dressed upper torso. Legs and feet next and socks. Center torso Wash quickly. Finish dressing, then shoes. And accessories. Touch up the hair. Good luck

Just a question, if they are scared of showers, why not a bath? My experience was Mom became like a child. Children do not like showers. I know my five yr old GSon doesn't. Mom was showered 3x a week by an aide but I washed her underarms every day.

Helpwithmil, how did you make out with the doctor and shower issue? Any updates? Did anything work? We all learn from each other and the showering issue is a huge problem for many of us.

Since she will be seeing her doctor, can you call the doctor in advance and warn them she’s no longer bathing and ask for their help in addressing it. Maybe the doctor can “order” her to bathe at least once/week for health reasons (elders sometimes believe an authority before the family). Or maybe they could give her a sponge bath while she’s there, “necessary to look for any skin issues.”

anxiety meds and a professional bathing aide are what you need.
get a bathing bench or bedside commode chair to go into the shower. If she is afraid that will help. Make her feel more secure.
Once you get it firmly established that there will be regular showers, she’ll get mad when the aide is late.
Dont let her in your car without her being clean.
You are in control.

Hi. I just got there a few weeks ago. My mother had not changed her clothes or showered in over a week. I called the facility where she will eventually live and asked for an aide to come and bathe her. She was happy. My mom is mild to moderate dementia. Her drivers license was revoked in September. I could not force her to bathe. She used to daily until September and then stopped. She also used to sleep in her bedroom. That also stopped. I was concerned about her hygiene. I could not force her to bathe but knew the consequences if she wouldn’t. Uti’s. Etc. thankfully she is really content with getting an aide to bathe her, cut her toe nails and brush her teeth twice a week. Got to add i m no expert dementia, but this seeens to be a conduit to a further level of care and assistance for the caregiver.