Resources for seniors where the husband and caregiver wife both have chronic illness?

There seems to be a dearth of wisdom for our situation. Two seniors, both with mobility disability, pain. I have one artificial hip, other hip going south, birth defect, add arthritis joint damage. Lifetime lifting restriction 8#. I’m on oxygen at night and on exertion. My interstitial lung disease is progressing. Husband had emphysema, and is having lung surgery to remove lung mass this week. Following week he will begin chemo. Both early diabetic, very strict dietary control to keep us both from becoming type 2 diabetics. (I’m self taught, no dietary help coming from the medical community). Spouse is older than I, and I do everything-shop, cook, laundry, pay bills, coordinate medical care times 2 people. He mows the yard for me, riding mower. Just keeping up with two people’s meds alone, and trying to pay for everything, I’m stressed. I have to take him to all appointments, as he is anatomy challenged, doesn’t understand difference between a hangnail and a heart attack. All the articles on being a caregiver presume the caregiver is healthy and able bodied. I’m struggling physically and mentally. No family nearby, and frankly, the 40-somethings offspring are a selfish bunch, so no help will be forthcoming from them.

Pearls of wisdom out there?