Like I said the Trust has limits. It was set up so Dad could receive SSD and Medicaid. Otherwise, he would have had to spend the money before he could apply for either.
There are restrictions. As I said can't be used for lodging, so Dad can't pay you rent, can't be used for food or some utilities because Dad can get this help because he has SS.
Again, if Dad is on Medicaid, when he passes the money will go to them to offset the money the state put out on his care. If anything is left, it reverts back to the beneficary. Your Aunt may not get anything from the trust.
My opinion, you tell her if she can't pay you, then she will need to put Dad in facility for his care. That you need to get back to work and earn some credit towards SS. After a few years of Medicaid paying for his care, the less she will get as beneficary.
He paid rent with me to the landlord. This is not about him getting his rent paid, it's about me being fairly compensated. No one else in the family would want to be bothered with him, or really care. Again, I spent my own coin to move him up, I cleared his storage shed, found us a place, changed his address for SSID, doctor, pharmacy, etc., didnt charge him utilities because he doesn't understand how expensive stuff is now, put everything in my name so it would be easier on my aunt for the clerical service she does for the trust, and I did this so everyone else in the family can live their lives free of worry, and if they're worried about money, idk why only paying me $2,400 for the year would be looked at as way too much money given everything I've done. There's over $90,000 left in the trust. Nothing was spent of my aunts or other family members to move him up, pay gas when he had appointments, no time of there's taken when he was having trouble breathing, washed his soiled pants after panic attacks, cleaned up his puke cause he drank too much, deal with his verbal abuse, be threatened to be killed and have him pull knifes or grab whatever object and act as if he would be throwing it at me, get upset cause I'd have a friend over to visit... I mean he is not the most pleasant person. Moving him to a care center is was me trying to prevent a healthcare facility, given his anger outbursts at times. He was at sober living home for 2 years before i moved him in. With his health failing and death of his mother, I knew his health would worsen. Before my grandmother died, she kept repeating "what's gonna happen to Matt? Will he be ok? What's gonna happen to them?" So I figured I'd be the one to make sure he could have some peace before he passed. Why would would the family not help, if there is enough money to do so? Also a week before my grandmother went to an assisted living home, an amendment was made to whom would be receiving the leftover benefits of my dads. It went from being me to being my aunt.
The trustee's hands are tied because you live there. The trustee also cannot pay for care unless a doctor certified the need in writing. If Dad can use a smartphone, he is not mentally incapacitated. My advice is get a job and let aunty find out the hard way how much help Dad needs. Start figuring out the dollar value of your room and board, because that question will come up in court.
I already did that back in Feburary or March 2018. My dad has been seeing his primary care doctor for at the very least 5 years so she would know. I've watched 2 year olds navigate smartphones, tablets, game consoles, so I don't know how operating a smartphone omits a person from not being able to make sound decisions on life, health, and money.
Thing is my aunt knows he can't live by himself, and knows about his addictions, attitude towards life, and especially her. I've explained to him a thousand times how to this trust works, he still thinks she won't, in his words 'give me my f@$#n money!'. My aunt has a masters degree from Chico State University in social work and works for the Salinas prison parole board. She assess whether an inmate is mentally sound to be released into society. I even told her since she has such a crazy job and she did handle selling my grandmother's house and property that I'd do my part to take care of my dad so he doesn't harass her about the trust, and then I could by the grace of god help him find some meaning in life and love himself before he checks out of this planet. My dads father passed when my dad was 8yrs old and that severely traumatized him. He was also on Ritalin at age 6. And first started doing drugs and drinking when he was 12. In 1990, 91 he tried to commit suicide by jumping in front of a vehicle (Brand new Cadillac) traveling about 40mph. He was in a coma for over a week and took him a little over a year to gain most of his coordination back. He never truly gained it back. My dad even assaulted my aunt back in 03' cause she took his bottle of whiskey from him, poured it out, which started an argument that led him to punching her in the face. He was charged with assault and making terrorist threats cause he said he'd kill her. He tells me stories of her blackmailing him in highschool when she'd catch him with drugs or girls in the house(aunt is 5-6yrs older than my dad) which he has carried animosity about. When they talk, it will usually digress into an argument that resembles two teenagers fighting. I even told her that when I observed their body language and tone of voice that she can intimidate him which triggers his anxiety and anger. Idk why she's so stingy about paying me or buying him things. It's not her money. But an amendment was made a week before my grandmother was placed in assisted living, making her the beneficiary of the rest of his half once he is deceased.
Call Office of Aging or probate office and see if they have a number for legal aid. Don't think u could sue for pain and suffering but could for not being paid maybe. Run it by the lawyer. Trustees have a certain amt of responsibility. Since Medicaid is involved she may have to show how she spent the money when Dad passes. Maybe asking for an accounting now and if found she is abusing her duties (like using the money for personal use) you can have a judge make you trustee. She was not assigned by your Dad like a POA but appointed by a judge and that appointment can be revolked by a judge.
You should have been receiving Dads SS for his care. Maybe be his payee. If you weren't receiving it, what was she doing with it. If payee, then she needs to be held accountable.
Spazzy, I am shaking my head when I read that your Aunt thinks you are sitting around doing nothing. Has your Aunt ever came over to spend time with her brother to see how much work is involved? A couple of hours visit won't prove anything, she needs to help out for a week or two. Then and only then she will appreciate all the work that is involved.
Since you are only in your 30's, you really need to get back out into the work force, to add money to your Social Security and to Medicare, and to build up your own retirement fund. Wonder if your Aunt would pay for a professional caregiver? If yes, jump at that chance.
If you go to my profile, you can see a back story. If it's not enough you can ask something specific. Relationship- she is my aunt. It started off fine at first. But later when I quit my job to assist him more, she said she wouldn't pay me to sit and do nothing. My father has a doctors note saying he needs assistance. He's also an alcoholic and meth addict. Last time he lived on his own it was a disaster.
I moved my dad in with me Feb. 2017. The town was evacuated of potential flooding because Oroville damn was about to collapse. My aunt already moved my dad while I was sleeping. So I can't move any of my things or even wash my clothes. I never charged my dad for utilities. I was paid $200/m. So $2,400/year. In this time, his weight is up 20 lbs, got him to see pulmonologist, took him to doctor chiropractor appointments, got him on anti depressants to help his anxiety, helped him quit drinking and smoking cigarettes cause he has COPD.
They are not POAs they are trustees. And yes they can refuse to pay out of the trust. There are limitations to the trust. No food, lodging, electricity or heating can be paid out. My nephews reads homecare workers can be paid by the trust if no public assistance is available.
Is your Dad on Medicaid of any kind? I ask because any monies left in the trust upon Dads death goes to pay off Medicaid first, then the balance goes to the beneficiary.
My dad is on SSID, and believe he gets Medi-Cal. There was also descrepencies on some of the financial report for the year. $550 for two concert tickets that retailed at $30 dollars each.
Spazzy2112, yes more information would be helpful.
From what I am reading on your profile, you are the caregiver for your father. And the Special Needs Trust Power of Attorney doesn't want to give you a salary for helping with your Dad?
What does the Special Needs Trust say regarding this, or is it spelled out?
Please note that a vast majority of grown children do NOT get paid for taking care of their elderly parents. So chances are your lawsuit for "pain and suffering" would be thrown out by a Judge.
My aunt is the executor of the trust. In a list that was given to us after my grandmothers passing, one of the items ok is for to pay for a an assisted living facility, or someone to pay for him to help him with day to day activities. Like yard work, cleaning living room, driving him to and from doctor appointments. What's weird is my aunt never fully went over all the in's and out's of what his trust covered, refused to buy him items it said the trust covered, accused me of wanting to take a new smartphone I had to basically plea to her to buy for him cause his was old and outdated, she said she would pay me more if I had to spend more time with him cause of his health, then refused to. Idk why she would think that I'd quit my full time job making decent money to live off less than $1,000 a month and do nothing. This is really not about me getting some giant paycheck. She prevented me from truly giving him the best care and look after his well being possible by never being forth coming, offering guidance, and being accusatory to me, and minimizing how hard a person he is to handle. I'm sure it looks funny to everyone and that I'm just trying to get money, but in previous conversations has said she doesn't have to get him anything if she doesn't want to, and also blocked him from calling her. She's upset because i chose to fight back and not let my dad and I be bullied.
More information is needed. What is the relationship between you and the trustee? What reasons are being given? I doubt if you will get anywhere regarding your own ‘pain and suffering’. You can always move out and let the trustee make other arrangements. Clearly there is a back story here.
8 Answers
Helpful Newest
First Oldest
First
There are restrictions. As I said can't be used for lodging, so Dad can't pay you rent, can't be used for food or some utilities because Dad can get this help because he has SS.
Again, if Dad is on Medicaid, when he passes the money will go to them to offset the money the state put out on his care. If anything is left, it reverts back to the beneficary. Your Aunt may not get anything from the trust.
My opinion, you tell her if she can't pay you, then she will need to put Dad in facility for his care. That you need to get back to work and earn some credit towards SS. After a few years of Medicaid paying for his care, the less she will get as beneficary.
Moving him to a care center is was me trying to prevent a healthcare facility, given his anger outbursts at times. He was at sober living home for 2 years before i moved him in. With his health failing and death of his mother, I knew his health would worsen. Before my grandmother died, she kept repeating "what's gonna happen to Matt? Will he be ok? What's gonna happen to them?" So I figured I'd be the one to make sure he could have some peace before he passed. Why would would the family not help, if there is enough money to do so?
Also a week before my grandmother went to an assisted living home, an amendment was made to whom would be receiving the leftover benefits of my dads. It went from being me to being my aunt.
Thing is my aunt knows he can't live by himself, and knows about his addictions, attitude towards life, and especially her. I've explained to him a thousand times how to this trust works, he still thinks she won't, in his words 'give me my f@$#n money!'.
My aunt has a masters degree from Chico State University in social work and works for the Salinas prison parole board. She assess whether an inmate is mentally sound to be released into society. I even told her since she has such a crazy job and she did handle selling my grandmother's house and property that I'd do my part to take care of my dad so he doesn't harass her about the trust, and then I could by the grace of god help him find some meaning in life and love himself before he checks out of this planet. My dads father passed when my dad was 8yrs old and that severely traumatized him. He was also on Ritalin at age 6. And first started doing drugs and drinking when he was 12. In 1990, 91 he tried to commit suicide by jumping in front of a vehicle (Brand new Cadillac) traveling about 40mph. He was in a coma for over a week and took him a little over a year to gain most of his coordination back. He never truly gained it back.
My dad even assaulted my aunt back in 03' cause she took his bottle of whiskey from him, poured it out, which started an argument that led him to punching her in the face.
He was charged with assault and making terrorist threats cause he said he'd kill her. He tells me stories of her blackmailing him in highschool when she'd catch him with drugs or girls in the house(aunt is 5-6yrs older than my dad) which he has carried animosity about. When they talk, it will usually digress into an argument that resembles two teenagers fighting. I even told her that when I observed their body language and tone of voice that she can intimidate him which triggers his anxiety and anger.
Idk why she's so stingy about paying me or buying him things. It's not her money. But an amendment was made a week before my grandmother was placed in assisted living, making her the beneficiary of the rest of his half once he is deceased.
ADVERTISEMENT
You should have been receiving Dads SS for his care. Maybe be his payee. If you weren't receiving it, what was she doing with it. If payee, then she needs to be held accountable.
Since you are only in your 30's, you really need to get back out into the work force, to add money to your Social Security and to Medicare, and to build up your own retirement fund. Wonder if your Aunt would pay for a professional caregiver? If yes, jump at that chance.
I moved my dad in with me Feb. 2017. The town was evacuated of potential flooding because Oroville damn was about to collapse.
My aunt already moved my dad while I was sleeping. So I can't move any of my things or even wash my clothes. I never charged my dad for utilities. I was paid $200/m. So $2,400/year. In this time, his weight is up 20 lbs, got him to see pulmonologist, took him to doctor chiropractor appointments, got him on anti depressants to help his anxiety, helped him quit drinking and smoking cigarettes cause he has COPD.
Is your Dad on Medicaid of any kind? I ask because any monies left in the trust upon Dads death goes to pay off Medicaid first, then the balance goes to the beneficiary.
From what I am reading on your profile, you are the caregiver for your father. And the Special Needs Trust Power of Attorney doesn't want to give you a salary for helping with your Dad?
What does the Special Needs Trust say regarding this, or is it spelled out?
Please note that a vast majority of grown children do NOT get paid for taking care of their elderly parents. So chances are your lawsuit for "pain and suffering" would be thrown out by a Judge.
What's weird is my aunt never fully went over all the in's and out's of what his trust covered, refused to buy him items it said the trust covered, accused me of wanting to take a new smartphone I had to basically plea to her to buy for him cause his was old and outdated, she said she would pay me more if I had to spend more time with him cause of his health, then refused to. Idk why she would think that I'd quit my full time job making decent money to live off less than $1,000 a month and do nothing. This is really not about me getting some giant paycheck. She prevented me from truly giving him the best care and look after his well being possible by never being forth coming, offering guidance, and being accusatory to me, and minimizing how hard a person he is to handle. I'm sure it looks funny to everyone and that I'm just trying to get money, but in previous conversations has said she doesn't have to get him anything if she doesn't want to, and also blocked him from calling her. She's upset because i chose to fight back and not let my dad and I be bullied.