Patty342; You are so blessed to have siblings you are so lucky to have the choice to get help from your brothers and sisters ....remember to get all of the family together and share the responsibilities no matter how small the task is all the family should be involved or at least be given the opportunity to help weather they offer alot or just a little help not only do the other kids need to spend time with their father ... but your father needs to have his whole family as close as possable ...at this point in your dads life every visit could be the last visit so dad needs to feel LOVED BY ALL HIS CHILDREN.....and you need a BREAK !! Remember it is NEVER a burden to spend time with your parents it is a blessing so let the family in on the care!!!
Patty342, there comes a time when it can take a village to help with one parent. We each have our own limits. For me, my age was a major factor as I was in my late 60's helping my 90+ parents. Thankfully they were independent to a point, but the stress on me was through the roof that it affected my health.
Time to have a family meeting with the siblings. I read some time ago that close to 40% of family caregivers died leaving behind the love one they were caring. That is a caregiver who is doing it all by themselves. Those are not good odds. If anything should happen to you, what would the sibling do to help Dad? The family needs to have a future plan to place.
If and when the time comes for Dad to move to a place that has professional care, better plan now.... preview places now... get Dad on a waiting list [some places are booked for months on end]... and check to see if Dad can budget living a facility self-pay or if Medicaid is needed.
It’s very kind of you to want to bear the burden of caring for your dad all alone. But you are admitting that you’re tired and perhaps also getting burned out. It’s time to have a family meeting and figure out a way to either share the caregiving or discuss alternative living arrangements for your father. If you wear yourself out and and your own health suffers, your siblings will probably wonder why the heck you never said anything to them until it was too late. In all honesty, they probably won’t see you as a “hero” and won’t appreciate what you’re doing.
Have none of them called you to see how your father is? Do you cover up what’s really going on? Please be honest with them.
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Time to have a family meeting with the siblings. I read some time ago that close to 40% of family caregivers died leaving behind the love one they were caring. That is a caregiver who is doing it all by themselves. Those are not good odds. If anything should happen to you, what would the sibling do to help Dad? The family needs to have a future plan to place.
If and when the time comes for Dad to move to a place that has professional care, better plan now.... preview places now... get Dad on a waiting list [some places are booked for months on end]... and check to see if Dad can budget living a facility self-pay or if Medicaid is needed.
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Have none of them called you to see how your father is? Do you cover up what’s really going on? Please be honest with them.