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mishelly27 Asked January 2019

Has anyone here been unhappy with nursing home care and psychiatric hospitals and taken their loved one out of care? How did it go?

My dad was walking, talking, eating, going the bathroom by himself, and showering by himself. He was overmedicated and almost killed at a psych unit and he can barely speak, eats only pureed foods and cant walk or go to the bathroom. I am completely fed up with the system and how they have treated my father. It has been more stressful having him in someone else's care than in my own. Every time he is over medicated and gets better, then overmedicated and rebounds. I can't go through that anymore. I have been to more hospitals, psych units, and nursing homes than I ever cared to. He is difficult. I know this. But he is bedridden and weak. I know exactly what I am up against with caring for him. Its going to be ugly, difficult, and stressful. That being said, nothing is more stressful than the peace of mind I have lost in this situation. I would be happy if his final days were at home with his family. He has Medicare/Medicaid and qualifies for palliative/hospice home care. Has anyone done this? Experiences? Advice? Thank you!

JoAnn29 Jan 2019
Your previous post said Dad has been "kicked out" of other facilities because of his behaviour. Do you think that will change because he is living with you?

My daughter explained to me that these drugs take 30 days to see if they work. Lots of adjusting. If they don't, then its another try for 30 days. So now its quality of life thing. And it does look like you are between a rock and a hard place.

Talk to Hospice. Tell them the situation and what you would like to do. They can evaluate him at the NH. If they feel he can be cared for at home, then try it. Be aware, though, Hospice is not there 24/7 but someone has to be. You will get an aide to help with bathing. He will be kept comfortable, probably with morphine. Nurse only comes to see him maybe 3x a week but she is available 24/7. The family is responsible for care in between.

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