Can we put mom in a home now that she has been declared by two doctors as unable to make her own decisions? Or do we have to have a lawyer?

Do you know why brother is ‘dragging his feet’? Does he not like the idea? Are you doing all the work, so he doesn’t have much of an incentive? Is he trying to preserve his own inheritance? Is he making up what he is telling you, because he likes to be seen as the one in charge?

If nothing happens soon, you are going to push things to make them happen. One way to do it is to make both the inquiries and plans yourself, and tell him that you are going to go ahead. If he says ‘no you can’t do that’, don’t take any notice until he comes up with the paperwork and his own proposal. He can’t pull rank unless he is prepared to justify his ‘rights’.

You need to find out where Mom stands financially. Then you can determine if she can go to an AL or will need LTC. Depending where u live, an AL will cost 5k a month at least. It all depends on level of care she needs. A LTC facility will be about 10k.

Medicaid may come into the picture if she doesn't have enough money for her care. Each state has their own criteria but basically they all are the same. All assets have to be liquidated and spent down to cap allowed, 2k in my state. Prepaying for a funeral would be one way to spend down. With my Mom she had enough money with her SS and pension to private pay for a NH for 2 months. This helped spend her down under the cap. Once you file, you have about 90 days to get paperwork needed, spent down and in a facility.

Your brother needs to get on the ball. That Trust will have an impact on Medicaid.

Does Mom have a POA? Do you know what lawyer created the trust document? Does "Brother has trust" mean he has the only family copy of the trust document or that your brother is the trustee?