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chrismsherman Asked April 2019

Assisted living facility wants family to hire outside help for dad due to frequent falls. The expense is astronomical. Any suggestions?

pamzimmrrt Apr 2019
This happened with my MIL.. they hired a lovely young lady with poor English who did not speak to my MIL, and spent most of her time sitting all the way across the common areas where MIL was parked daily.. and she played on her phone all the time,, no eyes on MIL and too far away to catch her when she got up. Nope.. not on my dime! Moving her to MC was cheaper( than paying for AL and the extra help ) and more eyes on her. Perhaps it is time for a move?
Renesmith Apr 2019
You are in a bind. My mom is in a NH. Her roommate has dementia. She has fallen out of her bed trying to get up numerous times during last month. My mom has had to buzz the nurse station each time. They have promised her daughter to put a fall mat beside her bed, but it has yet to appear. In other words,the NH probably will not be...or help with ...a solution. After seeing a woman fall out of her wheelchair face down onto the concrete floor right at the nurse's station with nurse's around (She had to be sent to hospital), I asked why she had not been restrained in the chair since they said it had happened before. I was told that a) she had probably done it on purpose and b) the "Safety Committee " says restraints are not allowed under gov't rules.
Isthisrealyreal Apr 2019
He needs more care than AL. Time to move him to the level he needs.

I am sorry, it is hard, but it is the best way to go to ensure his safety.

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golden23 Apr 2019
I second pamz. It sounds like dad needs a nigher level of care.

dragonflower Apr 2019
Part of the issue is that "assisted living" is not the same as a "nursing home." (You may be confusing the two.)

A person in assisted living is supposed to be somewhat independent. You father may need a higher level of care at this point (e.g., nursing home), if he is having frequent falls.

Harpcat Apr 2019
After dad kept falling and then had a pelvic fracture with a rehab stay, then back to AL and fell with a femur fracture and rehab stay, AL would not take him back. He didn’t need memory care so he went to LTC. Expensive..oh my yes!! But having to hire a daily sitter would have been even more. And as someone else said they’re on their phones most of the time. Time for LTC for your dad to have more eyes on him and immediate help close by.

anonymous476223 Apr 2019
It is truly not sustainable!! Who sets the prices of these senior group homes anyway?
You may feel to move your loved one to a SENIOR group home. When someone falls between assisted living and a nursing facility, for me, a licensed group home fills the gap.
Better care (usually 6 residents or so), more attention, slower pace, home-cooked meals and, the BIG one, less expensive.
They just don't have all the bells and whistles of a facility in terms of activities and events, yet CARE is priority in my humble opinion.
Invisible Apr 2019
The group homes I looked at were actually more expensive than the memory care places. They were also harder to get into. I worked for a woman with CP who lived in a couple of different group homes. Staff turnover was high and it is hard to get away if you have one bothersome resident. Also, since she was very dependent upon assistance for all daily living activities, she was somewhat at the mercy of everyone else's schedule. Issues might be very different with dementia residents.
gladimhere Apr 2019
This happened to my mom when she was in memory care. That sort of move will not resolve the issue with the need for a private caregiver due to falling, heck private one on one care will not resolve the issue of falling.

My mom had falls in memory care but her primary issue was agitation and aggression. That extra pair of eyes was necessary on and off over the two years mom was in a facility. Yes, it got expensive. Mom was eventually kicked out because of her behaviors. She was on hospice at the time. Hospice recommended an excellent care home where the caregiver resident ratio was better. Private caregivers were still necessary, occasionally. But, the care home was cheaper than memory care so, that helped.

mmcmahon12000 Apr 2019
Move Dad to NH. He needs it just like everyone here is saying.

anonymous824816 Apr 2019
Until I started taking care or looking out for mom I did not realize we all had the same mother:)
That said I had the same issue with mine and she eventually fell and had a brain bleed although small and healed. She could not re turn to ASL because of Level 2 back sore from setting to much. She refused to consider Nursing home before. What happens to many times is their refusal leads to what they do not want. So She ended up in rehab and next step is Continued Care we call it instead of nursing home. ASL do not offer continue monitoring, so it is private setters and the ASL has to approve them, or family. Private care cost more then Nursing homes I have found and you really do not know what you are getting. Good luck there is no magic help.

AvaC42 Apr 2019
I agree with GAinPA - finding the right/better fit could make the difference. My Mom is about at the same level as hers and was in an Assisted Living facility for only 3 weeks. She fell and broke her arm (along with multiple other injuries) and she was on the floor for a few hours before she was found. AL facilities are not required to check on residents as often as other types of facilities. After this happened, AL said she was not appropriate for their facility. It was a blessing in disguise as we had to find a Memory Care placement for her when she left rehab. She has been there for two weeks now and the difference has been remarkable. They check on her every couple of hours (more often if we had a higher level of care), encourage her to get out of her room and participate in activities and have seated her at meals with a group of ladies who are about at the same level of cognition. Mom no longer feels awkward because she "doesn't fit in" and most of the time is genuinely happy because she has met people she can relate to. There are many others there who need a lot more assistance so I can see where she will be able to age in place and probably won't need to move again. And it is considerably less expensive than paying caregivers and an ALF or a Skilled Nursing Facility (nursing home).
Lymie61 Apr 2019
Sounds like an ideal situation, good for you! It struck me that moving a LO to a place like this (if you can find one) sooner rather than later offers the benefit of helping them accept more help as that becomes necessary too. If they see it all around them, it's "normal" in their world the fear of standing out or being "different" the internal "shame" of not being able to walk un assisted for instance is removed seems like it might make it much easier on everyone.
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