He is of sound mind....no dementia. Apparently he has always been one of those guys. He tells me that his last caregiver, who was neglecting him, did all of these sexual things. I have been direct, redirected the conversation, used humor, been serious. I am out of ideas. My last lady was very overtly sexual, but it was because of dementia, and my strategies worked to get us past her impulses.
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Tell the family to get him a male caregiver!
Just because someone is old does not , DOES NOT, excuse this. By any means. This is the hidden #me too.
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The inappropriate behavior from my (formerly extremely prim/private/proper) loved one ranged from mild to outrageously inappropriate statements and inappropriate to extremely embarrassing conduct. As you can imagine, it was painful to watch this horrifying behavioral/personality transformation with a loved one.
Apparently this brain injury is fairly common with stroke patients. In an effort to help improve my loved one’s situation, I discussed this with many doctors. The doctors told me this would likely be the “new normal.”
As with any severe brain injury, the situation could improve slightly with time and healing. It did improve slightly for my family member, but not completely.
Understand that as this man’s brain is damaged, he no longer has control — don’t take anything he says personally. Please don’t judge him or his family. He simply can’t help it.
I had to grow to accept this - but you don’t!
The good news for you is you are not a family member! You have the choice to leave and should if this behavior is intolerable to you in any way.
Problem solved.
Unless the cousin is so terribly elderly and prim that you really can't face it, I wonder if it would be worth making him concentrate and saying okay, let's cut to the chase with this and stop messing about: your relative is highly sexed and it's making him not just a pest but a sexual harassment suit waiting to happen. What are the options?
One option, I have no idea whether it could be done legally or not, might be the obvious. If the gentleman was in the habit of accessing sex workers in the past, for example, could there possibly be a way of finding out more about his preferences and organising visits?
I myself find this more embarrassing than incontinence so I wouldn't blame you if you did too. But on the other hand I am quite sure he wouldn't be the only very elderly gentleman on a reputable escort agency's client list. Maybe he already is.
I think you need to know what the cousin knows. You obviously can't hire hookers for your client, but if it's legal in your state could he?