Several years ago my mom passed away to cancer, she left my younger brother, our grandmother, and myself. My grandmother, shortly after my mom was diagnosed, began falling and expecting my mom to care for her. My brother moved in with my grandmother in order to take care of her and make sure she was safe. After my mom passed away my grandmother fell several times. About a year ago she fell and medical power of attorney was brought up. My mom had been the POA, so I felt, as the oldest grandchild, I should take over. We went through the whole process and I became the medical power of attorney.
My grandmother, who would often make things up about my brother, began telling distant relatives, doctors, and nurses, that there was no food in her home and my brother and I would often leave her alone. None of this was true. Her kitchen was always stocked and we were always around to make sure she was okay. Well, my brother and I started getting nasty text messages from distant family and some of my grandmothers friends, because of the things she was saying. Even though my brother and I were taking turns staying with her, in the hospital, we were still being accused of neglect. Then, one morning, my brother woke up to find that a friend of our grandmothers had checked her out of her rehab facility and brought her home to get some of her things. My brother was told he needed to move out because they were going to sell her house and move her somewhere else. My grandmother told my brother to enjoy his life, and we didn't hear anything from anyone after that. I called the rehab facility my grandmother was in a few weeks later, because we had heard nothing, and I was informed that she was no longer there. My brother and I thought it was pretty clear that we were no longer wanted in our grandmothers life. Well, a few days ago I got a text, from a number I didn't have saved in my phone, telling me that my grandmother was on her way to the hospital, and because I'm POA, I had to go. This was a complete surprise to me because, again, I haven't heard from my grandmother, or anyone, about her in a year. I didn't go to the hospital, because I wasn't even sure who was texting me, and I knew that, after a year, I would be of no help. My brother and I are now, once again, receiving terrible texts and messages from people.
I guess what I want to know here is, how can I revoke my medical power of attorney? There are so many people who seemed willing to take her out of our care, I genuinely thought that someone else had taken over. Being told I'm a terrible person, after truly not even knowing where my grandmother has been, is awful. I'm just not sure where to go from here.
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In the meantime, write a letter saying that you are in the process of resigning as (grandmoms name) medical POA. That you ( name) and your brother (name) will no longer be responsible for grandmoms care. Reason being, she chose to ask brother to leave her home and have a good life, sold it and has chosen not to be in contact with her grandchildren since that time, which now has been a year. This has been your grandmothers choice, as such, please do not contact us again. You will be blocked from any further contact.
Next time you get a text, attach this letter and send back to them. Then block them.
From what I see, your grandmother has some kind of mental problem. Either Dementia, a personality disorder, or another problem. I have a feeling this person helping her thought they were going to get her money. Which, they probably have. Now she no longer has any and is showing health problems they want you to take over. That would be ur decision but from what u have written, GM will drain you. Take care of yourself. If you get a call from a Government agency, like APS, explain to them that you cannot care for Gma. The state will become guardian and place her in a NH.
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