For those caregivers here, you need to be very cautious. When unethical and corrupt individuals sense there are any sort of family problems or discord going on, they prey upon the older person, especially if they have the beginnings of dementia. It’s rampant in places like Florida and Nevada, where there are high populations of seniors. It happened to my family in New Jersey. It’s called “abusive guardianship”.
If you need to make someone understand what abusive guardianship is all about, have them watch this interview:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lY1AQkJDUuE&t=677s
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About a year later mom was hospitalized with pneumonia and was there for three weeks. I talked her in to going to a short term rehab to get her strength back.
In home supportive services wouldn't let me schedule a time to have her evaluated until she was home . It took close to a year before she was evaluated and was given 20 hours a week. Before we could hire a caretaker she got sick again with a urinary tract infection that went septic. The hospital sent her home after only two days!and Three days later i had to call an ambulance. Someone called adult protective services I assume after I complained loudly about them sending her home the first time after only two days. The social worker from APS showed up and told me that if I take my mom home she would call the police. I couldn't figure out what she was talking about and she wouldn't elaborate. I had no intention of taking my mom home. She didn't come back and I focused on mom.
After three weeks in the hospital mom went to another temporary rehab for three months. She had her last care meeting the day she was coming home and the social worker at the rehab told me someone from APS was going to be there. I hadn't thought about it in three months. She comes in and talks to the Dr and nurses and mom. I asked her why she threatened to call the police when mom was at the hospital. She denied saying that and I told her that was a lie. The social worker from the rehab said she put in her report that she had threatened to call the police if I took mom home. She turned red and left. I thought that was the end. I was so wrong.
She put in her report that I took mom from the rehab against the advice of everyone there and turned it over to the guardian ship agency. About a month later some guy comes to mom's from the guardian ship place (I can't remember exactly what it was called) and wanted the last six months of mom's bank statements. I gave them to him. Mom gets $930 a month but was paying back an over payment due to when she was in rehab the first time she wasn't supposed to still be getting her disability check. She gets two checks a month that add up to $930. Her disability check was $330. She had to pay back $900 in $90 payments they took out of her disability check. So for three months her check was $90 less than usual and for the other three months all she got was $600 social security check because she was back in the rehab and I had called social security to make sure the same overpayment situation didn't happen again. Another two weeks go by and things were starting to look up. She had this company called Living Healthy at Home coming over. She had two nurses three CMA's a physical and occupational therapist.
One day after the CNA gave her a shower and I made her waffles I had a quick errand to run. Mom can't walk and was in a hospital bed. I was gone about an hour. When I got back she was gone. There was a note on her bed saying she was in the hospital and a card from the Guardianship place was attached. They had failure to thrive as her diagnosis which was BS she was finally leveling out. They had an emergency hearing that I wasn't told about and got temporary guardianship of her. They moved her to a nursing home in another city and changed the locks on her apartment. This was a month ago. They haven't gotten her clothes so she's in a hospital gown. They wouldn't let me in to get my stuff or her clothes. They quit paying her rent and she lost her apartment. I was told it was because I was using her money for myself. There was no money after I paid everything! I'm so upset.
Last week in Washington was open to victims, survivors, advocates, and media demanding elder abuse prevention and because June 15th was World Elder Abuse Awareness Day. Different groups planned different events to elevate the exploitation issues facing too many American seniors and IDD adults. The Arters Group, out of Phoenix, sponsored an all day free conference entitled “Knowledge is Power, a Workshop for Elder Abuse Victims” CEAR planned meetings with key staffers in the House and Senate and law enforcement to discuss pending and needed federal legislation to best protect seniors involved in adult guardianships or the probate environment. I visited senator offices with this group on Wednesday to discuss the Guardianship Accountability Act (S591) and other proposed legislation. So this growing issue is slowly coming into the public eye. We all have our work cut out for us but we have to get the word out so others are aware.
I suggest you google Dr Sam Sugar and his group called AAAPG and another group caller CEAR (Center for Estate Administration Reform) to hear more about this. I truly feel sorry to hear what’s been done to you and your mother so far as I am an only child too. You can’t trust judges, lawyers, nursing homes and APS / Ombudsman. Stay strong. You will get through this.
It appears the same crime as CPS has done to children and their families, motivated by money and power, taking children away from parents and loved ones.
As caregivers, we have often given advice to bring in APS. I am reluctant to do that now that I know more where that is possibly headed. Except in cases where a person has no family, living with 2 inches thick of cockroaches on the floor, and animals being neglected and some dying, then I would call APS, maybe.
Also, as caregivers, we have given advice to see a lawyer. Now I can see where the lawyers can be a part of the conspiracy to obtain guardianship of our elders.
Part of this is because we are not lawyers and cannot give legal advice specific to one case. Part of the reason is to offer a disclaimer. It is a very slippery slope, not knowing to whom you are addressing on a public forum. Some people, like my husband, with his condition, can only take things very literally, and will misinterpret your words of advice. Additionally, people with certain cognitive disabilities cannot be trusted to carry through on the advice given as you might have intended. imo. They come back at you with: "But you said to....as my husband often does.
I can understand that "abusive guardianship" is a very dangerous, slippery slope.
And would be a hot topic.
That is why I am withdrawing from this topic/thread. It is not my role to teach anyone about it. If someone does not understand what I said here, just ignore it.
I found value in what the OP has tried to enlighten us about. Critics or disbelievers, do not come after me for my opinion here. Do your own research.
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Do a search for "April Parks in Nevada" or just April Parks.
She is the reason I petitioned for guardianship for my Luz. To protect Luz from the leaches.
Nevada has cleaned up this act a whole great big bunch in the last three years.
The court here is now leaning strongly toward the family for guardianship.
But is still exist in other states and counties.
Do you have any recourse for the criminal acts against your loved one?
I am so sorry that you are having to go through this.
The New Yorker did a story how the elderly lose their rights. Google it. It's about this very case.