She has extremely low sodium which made her body not function well she fell in the kitchen and had open her head 6 stitches. She fell again when my brother took her to the rest room then she had some bleeding in brain. She was in icu for about a week. She is still in the hospital doctors say she fights them not to give medications so she is declining my brother became proxy and told them do what they need to do so she can survive. Doctors wanted to send her to hospice because according to them she tells them no medications however she isnt mentally stable. Surgeons refuse to put a feeding tube because they state she may take it out. However she has an IV she hasn't ripped that off. They want to send her to hospice. I don't understand if she isn't mentally stable why are they letting her make decisions on her own. We explain this to the doctor and he states "well if I tell her I'm going to give her medications and she says no then I wont give to her." I was in shock I told him you stated to us as well as we can obviously see that my mother is not in the right state of mind so why will you not go with the family and give the medications to help my mother (which if they give medications is non life threatening). However they are not giving medications nor feeding tube and hospice isn't an option. Where and how we can help her if they are not doing as we ask they are sentencing my mother to death in something that can easily be helped. We need advice and help please.
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Even if Mom is mentally unstable, they cannot force anything on her.
Like I said, a doctor does not recommend Hospice unless he feels its needed.
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You need to find out why the doctor recommended Hospice. Criteria has changed but you still have to have something you are going to eventually die from.
It is really important to do as much as you can to ensure the best care possible for her.
Hopefully someone has a medical power of attorney and a Durable POA because without those, your mom is still able to make decisions for herself.
You are able to get a second opinion, it is a medical right that we all have. You may have to find the doctor, but ask the patient advocate how to get this done. Every hospital has patient advocates on staff to help with these very situations.
Most important, listen to what they are explaining about her condition and prognosis. Then research what the options are for treatment and prognosis. Ask questions if they say something you don't understand, stay calm and be reasonable, this will get you better assistance, I promise. Approach them with the attitude of, I am confused and I don't understand what is going on with my mom, I need help understanding the situation, please help me understand. People want to help, they don't want to argue and defend what they are saying, listen and then use the internet to find out if there are alternatives.
I am sorry that you are going through this, it is scary and confusing and highly volatile, so deep breath and ask for help in understanding the diagnosis, then you have the ability to research.
Hugs! I pray that your mom pulls through and has quality of life.
Unless you have legal standing to speak for you mom, the docs have to respect her wishes.
YoU CAN sue for guardianship. Ask the hospital social worker about how to do that.
Where does your mom stand with the brain bleed? Did it heal on its own?
You do have a right to ask for a second opinion in that same hospital.
Does your mom have any other health issues?
How old is she?
I don't think the Drs are sentencing your mom to death...it seems there is something missing or the surgeon is afraid of legal actions being taken against him/her, or the surgeon sees or knows something you don't and he/she is not telling you. I don't have any idea what that would be.
I am sorry if I sound harass. I don't mean too, but I want you to have some idea of what you are asking for.
As always I or anybody else can not Dx or Tx anybody on this forum. All we can do is give advice by which the information is given and based on our own experience.
I am sorry you are having a difficult time.
Best wishes!