I'm wanting to connect and share with a specific group of people: those who are caregivers living in the elderly loved one's home with them. It seems to be the lesser-chosen scenario.
My husband and I made this move last year, and it has been tricky because his 91-year-old mom still acts like she's able to continue running her home the way she always used to (many weird stories to tell about why she is NOT able to do this...). She can get quite agitated and hostile when confronted with her new normal.
But it seemed like the least disruptive and least expensive way to go. For now, she has a lady who comes in for 5 hours a day and takes care of most of her physical assistance needs. But she can't be left alone. We work from home anyway, so living here lets us work AND keep an eye on her. Also, we don't have to go far (just down the hall) to visit with her. Thankfully, it's a large house and she's been pretty good about respecting our privacy so far.
Would love to hear from others who chose this path. What have been your challenges, solutions, joys, etc.? What's your story?
4 Answers
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Mom and I live together.
We experience many differences in cleaning, sleeping patterns, tv shows, etc.
Having a sitter/companion is a good first step.
I would like to suggest one day per week, when she is allowed to suggest everything and you all follow thru....Household chores, meals, errands, tv shows...
The elderly want to always feel valued in their opinions and independent in having some opportunity to make decisions for those she cares for.
Looks like ur situation is working for now. Others will chime in.
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as dementia progressed, I was constantly being woke up all night long. I rarely got enough sleep! How will this work with you. Being two people, can one take the night shift and then get to sleep the next morning? Cannot figure out how both can work from home....someone is going to be working while completely exhausted. The other is going to be working much less while they run to take care of Mom every 5 minutes.
dementia will not get better. As it progresses she will need round the clock care....don’t count on getting a good nights sleep again.
it worked for me because my parents had paid home health aides that came every day for 6 hours. I didn’t work, so I could sleep those hours..otherwise I would have been dead somewhere.
I will say that I am looking forward to having our own house someday. Meanwhile, my hobby is going looky-loo house-shopping on Zillow and Trulia. Haha!