Mod Alz
left sided stroke
fall risk
high BP
3 tia’s
seizure disorder
sinus bradycardia
heart attack
diabetes
lupron injections for prostate CA
Incontinent bladder (& bowel sometimes)
hard of hearing
Uses walker for short distance & I push him in transport wheel chair.
Receives care at V.A. 65 mi away! I’m a 65 y.o. R.N. w/a terrible back. Sole caregiver until day aide started 2 mos ago for 14 hrs/wk. 2 sets of stairs going DOWN to get to car.
I’m headed towards a nervous breakdown. Crying, insomnia.
Married 42 yrs & together since I was 17 yo H.S. grad & him a 23 yo Vietnam Vet. Losing my best friend.
Facility has 196 beds for Vets only. Patients/Facility appeared very clean, however we know that’s not the entire criteria for placement. He believed he was going to the Neuro to be told he could finally drive, but I called & alerted the MD that I can’t do this anymore & I’d found a place I think would fit his needs both emotionally (terrible PTSD & crying 24/7...taking Cymbalta (w/positive results...he’d be surrounded by other Vets ) & physically (no more wallowing in bed watching TV).
Yesterday he seemed almost normal! Now I am second guessing myself.
We have 1 son & 18 m.o. granddaughter 1 hr away. Isolated in the cold snowy mts., power failures & trees fell on house 2 yrs ago! Stores 20 mins away. Very difficult to say the least. He retired in 2010 & I have held onto a grudge since then b/c he refused to move to a ranch or condo in a warmer climate.
I don’t even know how my health is b/c I haven’t had a physical in 5 yrs. Everything revolves around his physical probs...prostate cancer at 50 (surgery & failed radiation)...3 fingers reattached...bilateral knee replacement...bilateral rotator cuff repaired,tumor on appendix & abdominal infection which lead to 1/3 colon removed,along w/the ongoing health probs listed above.
I suffer from several back probs, chronic sciatica, fibromyalgia, depression, celiac disease, Grave’s disease (have nodule on thyroid...need ultrasound & bloodwork ! )
Sounds like a terrible nightmare now that I see my life written down! My friend who’s a Social Worker said,” You have NO life ! Everyday is “ Groundhog Day !!
I’ve almost finished filling out the application for the facility. He just walked into the kitchen using walker asking me to make him a scrambled egg sandwich & cup of coffee! Clear as a bell! I don’t know if it’s time yet if he’s acting like this !
:(
6 Answers
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I have filled out the application & only have the financial page left.Then I will fax it to the MD so he can write his findings & pass it on to the Facility for approval.
Big hugs to everyone who took the time to write a message.I need affirmation that I’m doing the best thing for my husband, & me as well.
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You know that this lucidity is just a break in the clouds; and besides, how does that help your back or your stress levels?
Please keep in touch, especially when you're feeling wobbly. Hugs.
He has moderate dementia. Just because he's not totally out of control right now does NOT mean he's fine. It's only going to get worse.
Permanent placement is appropriate because he needs you as his advocate-- not in your grave.