With help from 2 relatives who made sure she has them. One said she probably won't even go anywhere when I tried to intervene. Well today I didn't give her her keys and she calls said relative and whines to them. Who I believe told her she would take her to grocery store.
Then she says I just won't even go now.
I will and have and will continue to take her to the store but she flip flops so much and puts conditions on it each time. It's a war. She is using the 'my keys' as an excuse to manipulate me. Everything is a battle. When she is bored she is worse but won't do anything I suggest. Everything is 'not right now, or I'll do it tomorrow or let's just wait'
Since I have her healthcare power of attorney if feel like it's my responsibility to see to her safety and that of others. Right? I gave her her keys after she wouldn't stop harping. I can't control what she does.
I'm not asking a question as much as venting.
I won't speak to the relative in this case because they don't believe in normal adult conversations, and out of sight out of mind is usually the motto anyway. What to do?
4 Answers
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I took her to the grocery store, we went in my car. I know my heart is in the right place, and I'm doing the best I can, what else can you do? Just getting burned out more each day.
thank you again
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If she's not able to drive, the fact that she isn't reasonable, can't communicate well and changes her mind isn't surprising. She likely isn't capable, if she has cognitive decline. If she doesn't have transportation, then, I'd ensure that she has what she needs. Debating and expecting her to use reason, probably isn't realistic. You may need to make sure it happens. You might set up a schedule of who takes her where and when, but, she may likely not remember it.
I agree that it's none of the relatives business if they are enabling her to do things that is dangerous. I'd not engage them about it, unless, necessary.