Am I legally responsible for my husband who is wheelchair bound and has mild dementia ?

My advice would be to start planning to place him in a home. Unfortunately it is only going to get worse and you will not be able to handle caring for him by yourself. If you have money, meet with an attorney and start planning for the costs involved and plan the transition to Medicaid. The spend down will be done by paying the $25/hr for the in home help until you can place him in a home. APS would come out if someone, either a health care professional or neighbor, sees he's in a situation at risk. APS would likely insist he has in home care.

I don't think you need to worry about being handcuffed and taken away for leaving him for a few hours! But, someone might come to investigate (if there was some report), and help you to solve your problem. I always worry about what would happen if there were a fire while you were away. In a case of death, there is a possibility that you might be charged. As everyone says here, it's worth the peace of mind to find a solution before there is a crisis. Adult day care might solve a lot of problems....he would have care and socialization and you would get regular respite time during the week to get out and go on your errands, (and have a bit of fun if you wanted!) Daycare solves a lot of problems! Good luck, and I hope you come up with a good plan.

Stitch, from your previous posts you’ve been having problems with dressing and issues toileting him, and his lack of mobility. And I believe you’re 80 years old? If you aren’t 100% sure he could even call 911, get a medical alert necklace that detects falls. But that doesn’t really solve the problem of keeping him safe does it? It just helps after the fact. On your previous posts we have all recommended to get help into the house for his and your safety. So why do you think a caregiver would just sit and watch him? That’s up to you what they do. For $25 an hour they could help dress him, toilet him, get him ready for the day and you could do your shopping or get out for a bit without worry. Wouldn’t that be a better outcome? Whats your plan when you have to go for the cataract surgery, or after when you have to stay still?
Your Spidey Sense is already telling you he shouldn’t be left alone, for his own safety. But you’re worried about getting into trouble? I don’t know if you could be legally charged with neglect for leaving him and something bad happened, but I’m sure other posters on here know. But what would you do differently if the answer is Yes?? Would that be the impetus for you?
And I quote you: “I know he needs to be in a facility”. OK, then, at least get help into the house.

A neighbor could contact Adult Protective Services to report an at risk person being left alone. What if he were to decide to go for a walk outside? He is not particularly mobile, but stranger things have happened.

Yes, you need to get out. Have some time for you. What if you were involved is an accident an injured? What if you were to have a medical issue and unable to talk? What if, what if, what if....

Wouldn't it be worth your peace of mind to arrange outside help a couple of times a week so that you can get out?