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anonymous618933 Asked October 2019

I’m looking for either 24/7 in-home or respite care for my 100 year old mom for 10 days in April 2020. Any recommendations?

... I'd like to attend best friend's wedding. Mom has dementia some days and other days she’s fine. Has some hearing and vision loss. Can use a walker/ wheelchair to get around. Needs assistance with food prep, medication, bathing and just monitoring when in a demented state. Otherwise her health is very good. She tends to sleep or nap a lot. I would prefer to find in-home caretaker(s) for those 10 days but will consider a decent facility??? Welcome any suggestions or advice. I’m not rich (retired) but can pay reasonable amount.

anonymous618933 Oct 2019
Thanks for all your answers and helpful info. Much appreciated!

worriedinCali Oct 2019
If you go through an agency you’ll probably be paying $30 an hour. 10 days @ 30 an hour is $7,200. You would probably be better off putting her in a skilled nursing facility or assisted living for respite care. You might see if she’s able to go on hospice, she doesn’t have to be nearing the end of life or predicted to go within 6 months. Aside from providing medical supplies and support, you can get 5 days respite care in a facility, which would save you a lot of money.

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Countrymouse Oct 2019
Ten days is probably going to be too long for one person's coming to stay in your mother's home to be the answer. No agency that I know of would book an aide in for ten days with no break.

Does it have to be the full ten days?

Does your mother have any support from caretakers or hired services at all at the moment? People she knows are likely to manage better, so perhaps this would be a good time to introduce a modest amount of home care and get her into a routine.

NYDaughterInLaw Oct 2019
In my opinion, you're better off finding a nursing home or memory care community that offers short term respite stays than trying to organize in-home care. First, it will take her days to adjust to 2-3 shifts of caregivers and you would have to introduce them days if not weeks in advance so that you feel comfortable leaving your mother in their care. Second, "when in a demented state" you do not know what your mother will do around strangers; you are underestimating what can go wrong.

ArtistDaughter Oct 2019
In home care would usually involve at least 3 care givers. You would do best by going through an agency because if 1 one of the care givers can't be there for some reason in those 10 days, the agency is responsible for providing another person. A respite facility would also have that in place so that your mom would for sure have 24 hour care. Most likely the in home care will be more expensive.

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