Father (90) talks less and less - sign of death?

My mother does not engage in conversation like she used to. She will speak when spoken to. No depression but has dementia, notice as disease progresses talking is less. I sometimes forget to put her hearing aides in, she is pretty deaf without them. I get so concerned and then realize it is either her batteries dead or hearing aides are not in. I would have your fathers hearing checked. Does he wear hearing aides? I would also have him evaluated by a psychiatrist for his depression, he might need an antidepressant. Loss of appetite is common when someone is depressed. I do not believe your father is near death, but I do think he is depressed and needs help asap. Sometimes people in a depressive state do not realize they need help, and that is when we as family need to step in and get the help they need. I feel bad for your dad, how sad . I would make sure he sees a doctor for an evaluation asap to check him out physically and mentally. Hope things improve.

My Dad is 97 and I have noticed the last few month's that he isn't really able to carry on a conversation. He will answer appropriately or smile and nod, but he doesn't ever initiate the conversation or help carry it.

He has the same issues as your dad.

Blessings

I'm really curious as to what types of things to be on the look out for when death may be pending. I think that often the family member comes here to let us know that their LO has passed away and we don't want to seem insensitive and pry about the details of what they observed. So, we may not get much in the way it happened.

My LO is on Hospice and seems to have a lot of signs, but, is still with us over a year later. It's quite the mystery. I've read quite a bit about what to expect. It seems she has many signs, but, they don't lead to death.

I've read that as one nears the end, they turn inward, reflecting on their life, their mortality, etc. They may not want to socialize or chat about their experience. I've read that it's a process and that the stages of grief that we often read about, Denial, Anger, etc. was really designed for a person who is facing their own mortality. Maybe, others here can comment on that.

I think more than a sign of impending death, it’s a sign of clinical depression. You said Dad is hard of hearing, and he may not respond because he doesn’t hear or understand what’s being said to him. If your mother shouts at him to get him to hear her, that could be making it worse. It goes without saying that he doesn’t feel good. No one wants to engage in social conversations when they’re sick and in pain.

My mother passed in 2016 at the age of 95. She was always an anti-social, paranoid and negative martyr. I discovered a few years ago that her father, who was most likely suffering from PTSD from WWI, committed suicide so he probably had issues, too. Your dad grew up in the age when depression was not recognized, talked about or treated.

You can speak with his doctor and share your concerns. But, if Dad is content ruminating over the past in bed, I’d say just leave him be. My mother was not happy unless she was unhappy and I think my grandfather was the same way. Whatever will be, will be.

There are lots of little signs that the end of life is approaching but you need to look for a cluster of them. Something else to be aware of is that all of those end of life web sites are usually focused on people who are dying from some form of terminal disease, the chronic conditions that many of the elderly are subject to may follow a similar pattern the time frame is often much longer - days become weeks, weeks become months, months become multiples of months or years.