My father had a heart attack three weeks ago and was moved to a skilled nursing g facility. I am flying in tomorrow to see him but my sister wont tell me where he is.
My father has been asking to see me this last year over and over again, and now I am scared I may have waited too long.
I live paycheck to paycheck at this time in my life which has made making the trip to him challenging. My sister doesn't live with the financial shackles as I do and has been there with him for two weeks. He signed the limited POA over to her and I do not know if that means she can keep him from me?
What do I do? I need to see my father and he has been waiting to see me.
9 Answers
Helpful Newest
First Oldest
First
My brother is worse than a piece of shit.......he is depriving my family of seeing my mom in the last years of her life & she is being controlled by him.
There should be laws protecting the elderly from this type of emotional & financial abuse but as long as they see that she is now safe they won’t do anything else.
To think that we were once close & now it has torn our family apart! My Dad would be appalled if he were alive to see what he has done. It’s all from greed & spite!
Hugs to all who have to deal with this type of sibling!
ADVERTISEMENT
thank you for caring. I’ve been told to just let it go & forget about it but I can’t. I know you’re in a similar situation so you know how I feel. Hugs! 🐼
It’s always going to be with us. We learn to cope better but forget it all? Kind of impossible to do.
Yes, I do understand that you are struggling with this. Hugs back.
So did she expect you to live in misery? You had your reasons for your divorce and you certainly didn’t need her okay to live your life the way you saw fit to.
Your sister is a control freak! I am so sorry she is so hateful! I repeat if your dad wants to see you then he shouldn’t be denied. If you want to see your father, you should be able to. She’s cruel and ridiculous. I’m sorry she is hurting both of you in this way.
Easy for people to say, “Get an attorney.” Unless they pay for it. Where is the money going to come from to hire a lawyer?
The hospital strong armed me with the hippa laws, the social worker said that I would need an attorney, and no other family members know where he is either.
I came back broke and crushed. I just don't get it, and I am not after any money. My sister never approved of my divorce and we've been estranged since then.
Ill keep trying to find dad and save for an attorney. I realize how important it is to have ourfinal wishes written for our children. If one of my sons kept the other one from me when I'm ill I would be heartbroken.
Thanks for the suggestions, it has helped.
Your sister does not have the right to keep you from your father. She is hiding things such as taking all of daddy's money.
Hopefully, she isn't abusing him, but that's a possibility.
You say she has the POA, get that stopped based on the fact she is hiding him through the Court.
I have an ugly step-beach who is doing EVERYTHING SHE CAN GET MY MOTHER'S MONEY BECAUSE DADDY DOESN'T HAVE ANY.
I am getting an asset divorce for my Mom. EVERYTHING MOM HAS IS SOLE/SEPARATE FROM 2ND MARRIAGE. Beach doesn't care and doesn't like Community Laws.
I have her on so many fraud issues, she really shouldn't be attempting to get spousal support because she (married to an MD) 'doesn't have money'. NO, HIS 4 SPAWN DETEST MY MOM. THEIR FATHER WOULDN'T HAVE ANY THING IF NOT FOR MY MOM!
Nope, don't mess with me when it comes to my Mother.
DO NOT ALLOW YOUR SISTER TO PUSH YOU AROUND.
I have horrible brothers so I understand how frustrating it is for you. I’m so sorry.
I would call the Discharge dept at the hospital he is in. See if they will tell u where Dad is. They had to send his records to the NH. If they say they can't do it, start calling Nursing homes. I would just ask "John Doe's room please". They will either put u thru or tell u that there is no one there by that name. If u ask if someone is there by that name they won't tell u. Pick the NHs close to Sister first. When u have the info, all u have to do is walk into the facility right into his room. Just act like a visitor. Don't introduce yourself to the nurses in case Sister has tried to block u. Let staff see how much Dad wants to see u. His wishes override the POA.
One lawyer I went to see wouldn’t even take the case because there would be a lot of litigation since my brother took my mom to a lawyer while she had dementia & got her to assign him as DPOA with unlimited powers & had her change her trust to him only instead of both of us like it originally was.