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KARIMBHAWAN Asked December 2019

Dad is 83. Vascular dementia. I began the biggest clear up operation and now I'm worried about when he gets back. Any advice?

Difficult man in every respect. I have never got on with him. I live with him but have my own space. He has been in hospital since Thursday having had a fall at home. The hospital kept him in and I began the biggest clear up operation you could imagine. I have thrown away a lot of his things. Useless crap. He is a massive hoarder with over 40 years of rubbish. Medicine from the 1980s, papers more than 40 years old, empty bottles, old clothes, items of old furniture and so on. Now I am worried about his reaction when he gets back which may be today or tomorrow.

gladimhere Dec 2019
If he is not home yet see about him going to rehab for awhile.

My mom was a hoarder too. The last trip she took out of town for a few days I was on a mission to clear the place out. She did not even notice. Her hubby sure did, though, and he was very, very appreciative.

JoAnn29 Dec 2019
Did Dad get home?
KARIMBHAWAN Dec 2019
No not yet

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JoAnn29 Dec 2019
I have to say something about disposing of meds. Medication changes over time and can be very dangerous. Do not flush down the toilet or down a drain. Check with your Police station or your Township Health officer to find out if they have drop offs for old meds. If your in an area where this is not available, put them in old coffee grounds. For some reason they neutralize the medication. Then seal the container and throw away.
KARIMBHAWAN Dec 2019
Hi i live in London UK and over here we take them to our pharmacy and they dispose of it safely
Tothill Dec 2019
Please let us know how it goes. I have been very slowly tackling some of the stuff at my dad's place. I did not find 40 year old medication but did find 20+ which I tossed.
KARIMBHAWAN Dec 2019
I will keep you posted. Does your dad know your sorting his stuff?
lealonnie1 Dec 2019
The doctor ordered the clean up before he'd agree to release you.......had no other choice dad, it wasn't safe!
KARIMBHAWAN Dec 2019
Thanks. Thats a good one
JoAnn29 Dec 2019
Don't think he will sue. Doubt if a lawyer will bother with it. Pray he won't notice. If he does, just say sorry but it was a health and safety hazzard. He will be mad but hopefully will forget eventually. Out of site out of mind.
KARIMBHAWAN Dec 2019
He cant sue. On what grounds?
Sunnygirl1 Dec 2019
If he remembers he probably won't be happy. Anyway to mess things up, leave a lot of stuff strewn about so the emptiness isn't so apparent? You might consult with an attorney, if you think he would take legal action.

Isthisrealyreal Dec 2019
Oh man dad, I have no clue what happened. You are sure you didn't leave it like this?😏😁🤔

Horse is gone, no need to worry about the barn door. 🐎

You could ask the doctor to say that he can only be released when his home is safe, maybe he can say he told you last Friday or something.

Maybe he won't notice! Just kidding, my mom is a hoarder and notices every single item that is missing, I just act surprised and terribly sorry that I threw it away, I thought it was trash. She stays mad, but what can she say when I have apologized.

Good luck!

KARIMBHAWAN Dec 2019
Hi DollyMe.

Haha it will take him many many years to accumulate to the level of what i have thrown out. Therapy won't happen. Yes he will hoard again but it will not be much in comparison. He cant live another 40 years.

anonymous912123 Dec 2019
Too late to start worrying, he will get over it. Unless he has therapy, he will start replacing the stuff!

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