Our aide likes to party when she is not working. Technically aren't we supposed to have her in the house since she is live in? We do not mind that she wants to go out but its excessive and she has been very irresponsible about it. How should I set boundaries and legally what can I do? If I tell the agency she will be fired. Thank you
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"She is paid for 16 hrs a day. She snuck a man in the house and took my parents car without asking."
My goodness why would you have us focus on setting a curfew when something like has happened? And I don't mean having a guest (man or otherwise), I mean taking the car without permission.
If she is from an agency you can ask for a replacement. Shouldn’t be a big issue.
BUT
the sneaking in a man and the borrowing of the car?!!!
She needs to be gone.
TODAY!
Tell the agency what she has done.
To do this kind of work you would have to literally give up your social life. I wouldn't want to be told what I can and can't do on my time off and not be able to have a guest over occasionally.
This must be a family situation. Something sounds off. No, they need someone older who has no outside interest other than maybe going to the park or the library and scoot back home to sit in their quarters and be good with that.
Taking the car without permission means she needs to be reported to employers & police so future potential employers are aware.
It is hard to get help to work such long hours. You may need plans for a second worker to allow 2 days off for primary worker I the future. Workers are legally entitled to days off...not just 8 hours to sleep. So work that in future plan.
It sounds as if you probably 'got' her cheap and expect the world. She shouldn't be expected to work sixteen hours a day (with only time to sleep off). Where she goes and what she does in her time off is none of your business so long as she shows up for work on time and fit to work, rested enough, etc. Is she young, an immigrant? These groups are very exploited by the agencies who hire them and by the clients too, often. Maybe you need to work with an agency who takes more interest in their employees and their clients and makes sure all terms of employment are clear and fair.
Some unmarried people want these live in jobs because they can save money. If they are not part of a household, this really cuts down on expenses. There have been people here who have posted, what do I do after mum dies, I have no job history, and will need to support myself. This may be a viable alternative.
If you do not like the labor law, vote for candidates that will change it --although I would note that even in New York, a liberal state, with the legislature and governor all Democrats, it is legal to pay residential live in employees 13 hours a day, as long as they get 8 hours of sleep time (at least 5 of which must be contiguous) and 3 hours of eating time.
If I otherwise liked and appreciated that aide I would treasure her, and I wouldn't give it a thought. You have not bought an entire life. She isn't your slave. She is someone working for you in an arrangement that seems to fit both your lives. If she is not a good fit anymore, and you believe you can do lots better, then by all means.......
You hired her through an agency for 24/7 daily live in? Wow. Didn't even realize there were such places until I saw a New York Times article exposing what is expected of workers from other countries (often enough) for 24/7.
I can only think that is very exploitative. And if this woman is working for you with no time off? That is not honestly lawful IMHO.
They should be saying 'NEXT' or helping with their mom more?? And clearly OP isn't up for what she wants the CG to bow to. Not blaming her either, jmo. It's not easy any way you roll the dice.
I think the employee might want more time off. Just because someone is paid to work 16 hours per day doesn't mean it's a good idea for that person to work 16 hours per day. Whoo-hoo! The employee gets 8 hours off every day! Would any of us like to have her job?