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Faith1551 Asked January 2020

Coping with declining dementia in my Dad?

My Dad is currently bed ridden, unable to care for himself, curled up in a frozen state from Parkinson’s, my Mom takes care of him full time and I am the caregiver for all errands food shopping house issues, doctors, phone calls, mail paying bills etc. I call her every day and see them both Saturday and Sunday. My Dad has declined to the point where he doesn’t recognize me anymore as of a few months ago. I thought it would stop hurting but it doesn’t it feels like new every time I see him, I am accepting of his illness and why he doesn’t recognize me but it’s my Dad and knowing how independent and intelligent he was once to see him like this is heartbreaking. I feel like I am in a fog most of the time, it weighs on me so much and my Mom is getting frail. I hate seeing her so sad about my Dad. I wonder how much more my heart can continue hurting, can someone relate to what I am going through?

Faith1551 Jan 2020
Thank you for your support, my Mom is ok we have help every now and again, my post was related more to the emotional side of dealing with this horrible disease. I know the road my Dad is on and am very accepting of it. We are all doing the best we can but it’s so hard to see him decline, he stopped responding little by little, every now and again he sings when he wants to communicate but it’s heartbreaking, anyone else experience this?

Geaton777 Jan 2020
I'm so sorry for your Dad's situation. We watched my stepFIL go through it, so (((hugs))) to you. Have you checked out your area's Council on Aging for resources that may provide respite, in-home care, etc? They know a lot. Blessings!

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Isthisrealyreal Jan 2020
Great big warm hug!

Does your dad get any in home health care and respite for mom?

She needs to take care of her to ensure that she is as strong as can be for this journey.

How do they feel about assisted living so that she can get some help and have some peer support?

NeedHelpWithMom Jan 2020
My mom has Parkinson’s. I took care of both of my parents too at their home and then mom lived with us for 15 years.

As you know, Parkinson’s is a progressive disease with no cure. It is true that as this disease progresses our parents are no longer the active people they once were.

It’s heartbreaking to see a parent decline. I’m so sorry. I don’t think you can help being sad for either of your parents.

Sending you a bazillion hugs.
Faith1551 Jan 2020
Thank you for your kind words

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