Find Senior Care (City or Zip)
Join Now Log In
M
Moyski Asked January 2020

I have just found out that my sister has had POA for my mum. My Brother was informed in writing at the time but not me. Is this legal?

Jada824 Jan 2020
I think it is legal. My sibling had DPOA done for my mom & had her trust amended & I didn’t know about it until a lawyer looked into another matter for me. The original trust had sibling as executor & myself as secondary but it was changed to his daughter instead of me & I had no knowledge of it.

The difference here is that my mom had dementia when all this was done & wasn’t capable of understanding the documents.

Moyski Jan 2020
Thank-you all for your quick answers. There are no hostilities between me and my siblings. After talking with Mother it seems she didn't want to burden me and the obvious person to be POA, in her opinion, is the eldest (my sister). As to telling my Brother : again she felt as he is male (her words) he had to be informed. The reason for my question was because I hadn't been informed I was worried that it may not be legal. Thank-you all for putting my mind at rest.
AlvaDeer Jan 2020
It is great news to hear that this isn't "warring siblings"; we see that so often on the forum and I am sorry to have seemed to assume it; your fast response allowed me to edit out the sentence in which I wrongly assumed no one is in a familial struggle. The best place to go with a question is always right to the horse's mouth. But yes, this is perfectly legal. Your Mom is able also to appoint someone to act as POA when the first choice isn't available. She can also, while of a reasonably sound mind, change her power of attorney at any time with great ease. And our elders do often still have that "the male must know" thing going. The world changes slowly. I am glad you are together in support of your Mom as that is so going to ease her latter years going forward.

ADVERTISEMENT


AlvaDeer Jan 2020
Power of attorney is conferred upon a person by someone who asks that person to act in their behalf. It isn't honestly in any way the business of anyone else, and no one has any obligation to inform anyone that they have chosen a power of attorney nor does the POA have any obligation to inform anyone. Certainly, assuming a family all gets along, it is more the norm that a parent giving power of attorney to one sibling inform the others, so that all can know this fact, can refer any bills and etc. they are aware of to that sibling who is acting as power of attorney. If you wish an explanation of why your parent chose one sibling to act as POA, it would be excellent to ask your parent why they personally chose that sibling. It could amount to where they live, could amount to their financial expertise (assuming this is financial) or their health expertise (assuming health). POA is a burden. It requires careful records and the gathering of knowledge and information. I would thank the sibling carrying out the work for doing so. But back to legal notification, no, none is required.
Moyski Jan 2020
thank you
anonymous912123 Jan 2020
Your mom has no legal obligation to tell anyone about her legal documents.

Ahmijoy Jan 2020
Are there bad feelings between you and your siblings and this is why he was informed and not you? Is it illegal? No, I don’t think so. Power of Attorney rights are between the person and their representative. When I was my mom’s, I don’t remember having to notify anyone of that appointment other than medical personnel at her facility, the bank, her insurance, apartment manager, etc. I’m an only child and there was no family left, but in all honesty, I probably would have made it known I was her POA just as a courtesy. The knowledge would not have given them any rights or the ability to make any decisions on her behalf, but I would have let them know anyway.

JoAnn29 Jan 2020
I agree with willie. Even the POA sometimes doesn't know they have been named. Which I think needs to be rectified. I think the assigned person needs to sign off they agree to the assignment and understand what is involved in being a POA.
ExhaustedPiper Jan 2020
This is true JoAnn. My mom had documents done in 2014- will, medical POA and DPOA. I was named as both medical and DPOA with my sister named as DPOA if I was unable or unwilling. The only one I had to sign off on was the medical POA. I didn't even know the other documents were drawn up.

Later after my mom's dementia diagnosis it was recommended that she assign these things, and she couldn't remember she already did! We then went to her document file and there they were.
cwillie Jan 2020
There is no obligation for your mother to inform anyone who she chooses to be her POA. Perhaps brother was told because there was an expectation that he would be appointed and she felt the need to tell him why he was not - or was he perhaps named in a previous document that was formally revoked?

ADVERTISEMENT

Ask a Question

Subscribe to
Our Newsletter