Will APS make my dad leave his home?

No, it sounds like he would still be considered competent. So he has the legal right to make his own decisions, including where he lives. They won't make him clean up his house either.

Early dementia is usually far from incompetence.

Sunflower, folks here often think that their parents will decline when removed from their unsafe homes.

Most folks have discovered that their parents thrived in their new environment.

I would make the call.

Sorry to say this, but APS would be right to remove him. You admit that his environment is totally unhealthy for him...you don’t think they would come and clean up for him and remove all the trash? No, they would call the health department and they will condemn the house...then they will remove him to a safe place.

from my own experience with hoarders, nothing you say will cause him to suddenly “see the light”. The only way you can make him safe is to call APS and let them do their job.

No clue what they will do. However, don't presume that he will not like AL, my mother fought us tooth & nail, as she is also very independent, now in AL she loves it.

We have no way of knowing what APS will determine as the best course of action. What we do know is that your dad’s situation requires intervention as he’s refused all attempts for help.

I had a similar experience with an elderly neighbor. She defiantly refused help and held on to her tragic idea of independence until she fell and broke her hip. Then social workers became involved and she was given the option of living with a family member or going to a nursing home. My point being that intervention is necessary and if you don’t call APS, something will likely happen to trigger the process anyway. I think you may have a better outcome if you’re the one to get the ball rolling.

No matter how this turns out, don’t feel guilty. You didn’t create this problem. You just want him to be safe. You’re a good daughter.

For my dad, they just said he should hire a care giver. But every case is different.