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Javagirl Asked February 2020

Elderly psychotic, depressed, dementia, anxiety ridden 94 year old won't take meds. Any advice?

What do you do when the SNF tells you they don't know how to help her.

Wearygirl Feb 2020
Yes, I have been present at medication time and she will not take the pills. She is paranoid, has talked about suicide, then denies it. They have had her on suicide watch where they check on her every 15 minutes, but the psychiatrist says she no longer needs to be watched because she isn't taking any anti-psychotic meds. I personally think it is manipulation to get me to sit there with her 24/7. She is a narcissistic person. The ONLY meds she takes is 1 pill for blood pressure and 1 thyroid pill to stimulate appetite because she won't eat. She has not taken anything but those 2 pills for the last 3 years. She is calling everyone she knows and telling lies about me. She can really cry and make you believe that I am abandoning her. I have never left her side (except to go places with my husband). The SNF is literally 3 blocks from my home and I used to go every day, twice a day but now I just can't stand the drama, so I have limited the amount of time that I will allow her to monopolize to 1 hour every other day.
Countrymouse Feb 2020
I'm delighted to hear it. May your boundaries stay strong! Hugs to you.
Geaton777 Feb 2020
KaleyBug, most pills are extremely bitter where no type of food masks the taste and some say they are not to be crushed or broken as this effects its ability to be absorbed at the right pace. Ask the pharmacist if it comes in a patch.

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KaleyBug Feb 2020
If pills can be crushed or dissolved can they go in her food or drink

Ahmijoy Feb 2020
Could she be on the wrong type of meds? One of the very few complaints I had about my mother’s SNF was that the doctor visited only once a week. I’m not sure if he was able to see all of the 200 residents there, but if he was, he probably spent 30 seconds with each one, if that. He didn’t know them or their histories. But even so, the staff had to follow his directives. In addition, all facilities are historically understaffed. The nurses don’t really have time to cajole and sweet-talk difficult patients to do things. I have to say though, that there was one aide, a large and somewhat intimidating lady, who could get my mother to do anything. She didn’t intimidate my mom, but she had the right attitude to get her to cooperate. We both adored this aide.

Have you ever been present at medication time? What happens? Perhaps you should be present to see what goes on.

Geaton777 Feb 2020
Javagirl, some more info would help: what has the SNF done to date for her, if anything? Thank you
Wearygirl Feb 2020
Sorry to take so long to respond; but yes, the SNF has done everything they can to help her. They have called the psych doctor as well as a psychologist comes once a week for her to talk to. She has the cell phone number of the man in charge of nutrition and he makes the kitchen aides take her anything she wants to eat. They have adjusted her meds a few times and nothing works. She won't take but one pill and then she refuses. She has hallucinations, calls everyone and lies about everything current. The SNF has had her on suicide watch where they check her every 15 minutes but the psychologist says she doesn't really need that...she is negative, negative, negative, fatalistic and very hard to be around. Then she can turn on the charm and be really sweet.
EdithHankl Feb 2020
I have no useful answer for you, but I'm responding in order to move your question back up into view, in hopes that others will have good answers (and maybe some clarifying questions) for you.

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