96 yr old Mother lives with me. She has dementia, but otherwise is healthy. Bowel movements often on toilet. Any advice?
When she has a bowel movement I often find it smeared on toilet seat. Sometimes I will find some of it on the floor. She then has stepped in it and then walks throughout house. Any suggestions? I have talked to her about it.
If she is not wearing depends now is the time. And as others have said, its time to be there when she goes. Eventually, you are going to have to do it all anyway. One of the things I didn't miss when Mom was in AL.
I found out two things that would have saved me a lot of trouble, the Depends tear down the side and you don't havve to take their slacks off to put on a new depend. I, too, used baby wipes. Huggies, they are big and thick.
Cheerfully and discreetly (by just taking it in your stride) accompany her to the toilet, ensure she is comfortably positioned, then stand outside and wait until you hear finishing up sounds. Knock, go in, and prompt/guide her through the cleaning up process, followed by hand-washing. Again, don't talk about it; just take it for granted that everybody needs a little help sometimes. This is also what you say to her if she asks, but as long as you don't humiliate her by calling attention to the reasons, and you do behave as though it's the most natural thing in the world, and you allow her maximum privacy, she probably won't question your presence.
You may find that she's standing up before she is quite done; or that she's not able to stand and stay standing - these are common reasons for the seat accidents.
If she's a bit late getting there, that would do it too, but in that case you need to assist her with reminders to go to the bathroom: it's best and most diplomatic to do this to a timetable, rather than find yourself bellowing "I said, do you want to do a poo?" across the living room.
Does she wear any sort of pull up or continence pad? - "substances" can fall out of these when they're changed and go unnoticed. Unnoticed for the time being, anyway :(
Bless her heart! Talking to her might not help because she is forgetful at this stage. Suggest wearing depends and toileting her with supervision every two hours. It works for my 97 year old mom .You might need to help her with cleaning, I use baby wipes. The best to both of you.
Dementia is a wasting-away disease of the brain. People who suffer from it often act like children. It sounds like your mom isn’t doing this intentionally. It may be that she’s no longer capable of recognizing the signs she has to go and by the time she gets to the bathroom, it’s too late. She doesn’t realize it’s on the floor and on her and the seat.
You can do a few things. Supervise her more carefully when she uses the bathroom. I don’t mean stand in front of her and stare at her while she sits on the toilet, but stand nearby the bathroom and ask her to tell you she’s finished. Help her wipe, wash her hands and make sure there’s no fecal matter on the floor. You can also get her a portable commode chair to put closer to where she spends most of her time.
If she has dementia, she won’t remember what you tell her.
5 Answers
Helpful Newest
First Oldest
First
I found out two things that would have saved me a lot of trouble, the Depends tear down the side and you don't havve to take their slacks off to put on a new depend. I, too, used baby wipes. Huggies, they are big and thick.
How do you put the new one on without taking their slacks off?
Cheerfully and discreetly (by just taking it in your stride) accompany her to the toilet, ensure she is comfortably positioned, then stand outside and wait until you hear finishing up sounds. Knock, go in, and prompt/guide her through the cleaning up process, followed by hand-washing. Again, don't talk about it; just take it for granted that everybody needs a little help sometimes. This is also what you say to her if she asks, but as long as you don't humiliate her by calling attention to the reasons, and you do behave as though it's the most natural thing in the world, and you allow her maximum privacy, she probably won't question your presence.
You may find that she's standing up before she is quite done; or that she's not able to stand and stay standing - these are common reasons for the seat accidents.
If she's a bit late getting there, that would do it too, but in that case you need to assist her with reminders to go to the bathroom: it's best and most diplomatic to do this to a timetable, rather than find yourself bellowing "I said, do you want to do a poo?" across the living room.
Does she wear any sort of pull up or continence pad? - "substances" can fall out of these when they're changed and go unnoticed. Unnoticed for the time being, anyway :(
ADVERTISEMENT
You can do a few things. Supervise her more carefully when she uses the bathroom. I don’t mean stand in front of her and stare at her while she sits on the toilet, but stand nearby the bathroom and ask her to tell you she’s finished. Help her wipe, wash her hands and make sure there’s no fecal matter on the floor. You can also get her a portable commode chair to put closer to where she spends most of her time.
If she has dementia, she won’t remember what you tell her.