A few years ago my mom was scammed by romance scammers for about $400k. Her entire savings for retirement is gone. My sister was caring for her until recently when she unexpectedly passed away in April. Now mom wants to move from Alabama to Maine to be closer to my family and her grandkids. She is selling her house to make the move but that won’t be enough to sustain her for many more years as it’s possible she has early onset dementia or frontal lobe dementia. She is still giving money away to guys (her social security checks, money gifted to her from when my sister passed away, etc.) and I need to control her money now. She has agreed and I am the DPOA but she can still revoke that if she gets upset. Is there a way legally she can give me control of her finances that won’t allow her to change her mind later? A 5 year look back would be detrimental to her right now and we can’t support her when her money runs out. Is a court my only option to try? Thank you for taking the time to read this. I know it’s long but it’s only the tip of the iceberg. Have a great day.
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What are her care needs? You say your sister was caring for her - and I'm very sorry for your family's loss - but what can't your mother manage for herself? (apart from not picking low-lifes, I mean.)
I know, I have one for my parents in the event they start giving away their living.
You can also tell mom that you will not be helping her at all if she doesn't allow you to help with the finances. She doesn't need to think that you are taking control, this is usually a non starter for people. Once you get agreement then you can arrange things in a way that protects her assets but gives her a weekly allowance for necessities and to spend as she pleases.
Best of luck, this buying love seems to be a common problem with so many seniors.
You could also ask about seeking Guardianship.
I am sure she would not want to do this willingly (if she knew what was going on) you would have to have a doctor state that she is not cognizant. But this would be the only way that you would have control without her being able to reverse the POA.
The question is to do it now where she is so you would have to be very involved in the sale of the house. (and I will tell you selling a house or any property as a Guardian for your Ward it is more difficult than just a sale) Or do you seek Guardianship once she moves to Maine. (beautiful state by the way. & home to Largest Whirlpool in the Western Hemisphere!)
Since you would have most of your dealings in Maine I would consult with an Attorney there first.
I had to travel out of state to get financial and medical POA for my Mom. Luckily the real estate agent I hired to sell my Mom's house knew of an excellent elder care attorney who took care of all the paperwork.
Hope this helps,
Jenna