Mom (82) just announced she has never loved a man the way she now loves her boyfriend from the memory care residence. Advice?

To all who are trying to decide if you should place your loved one in a group care facility, factor in this possibility too--your loved one could fall in love with another resident, and you'll be stuck with that facility, at that price, at that location, for longer than you thought, with no room for flexibility unless you are prepared to break your loved one's heart.

Mom has known R. less than one year. Both living in a small memory building with separate rooms, but spend all day and most nights together. Now they're both in the COVID unit of the rehab on the facility's campus, both with mild symptoms and will probably go back to their original building end of next week. Much to be grateful for, of course.

BUT the place is $9,000 per month. I've already wiped out her mutual funds paying for it, over the past 14 months. I recently surrendered one of her annuities, that will be gone too if she stays another year. This is a very expensive relationship.

AND I now have doubts about whether the facility can really provide appropriate medical care to my mother--even though she has no serious medical conditions at the moment, who can say when a new medical condition will arise?

It's an upscale place, but located in a major virus hot spot, so since the pandemic, they are constantly dealing with staff out sick, hiring less-trained substitutes, and visits to outside doctors are prohibited.

AND I have even learned of one incident when mom's boyfriend R. did not receive timely medical care for acute symptoms--FOR 3 DAYS he was confined in his room in the memory building with suspected COVID, severe diarrhea, severe dehydration, confusion, sometimes unable to respond when anyone spoke to him--FOR 3 DAYS before he was finally tested for virus, results received, and moved the next morning to COVID unit, where he received IV hydration and his mental status improved back to his usual.

All my reasoning tells me that returning her to the memory building is still not a safe a situation. Because of ongoing chaos of pandemic, she can't really receive medical care. She gets daily health monitoring from aides in the memory building--blood pressure, temperature, pulse oxymeter--but that's not really medical care. Because of ongoing chaos of pandemic, they will continue to be short-staffed, and treatment of residents' acute medical conditions may have to be postponed due to COVID precautions. I'm not comfortable with that scenario, and not comfortable paying for it.

I'm willing to bring her to my state, which has very few cases of virus, and keep her at home for a while, until conditions change and I would feel safe bringing her to adult day or a live-in facility.

BUT NOW if I move her from the current memory residence, I will be breaking her heart.

I'm so fed up with this situation.
If I had known she would fall in love with another resident and it would be impossible to move her, I never would've decided to place her in a facility at all.