Elder abuse? What constitutes elder abuse? What happens to the abusers when you report them?

You are overwhelmed. Everybody is leaning on you! - so no wonder.

I don't underestimate the impact of ADHD (on adults as well as on children), but your twins are in their forties and despite disability they are grown men leading independent lives. They are choosing to use the money, accommodation and emotional support you provide, whether you're willing or not. Such behaviour is reprehensible. Stop blaming yourself for it.

Where were they before? What's stopping them going back there?

i was trying to say that I believe they need to on ssi. the one with the physical injury probably will be on disability eventually because his injuries are not healing well. they just don't seem to understand what they put me thru. sometimes they get into screaming matches with each other. they expect me to "lend" them money. I try to tell them that I can't do this anymore. that they need to move on and let me live my life. I feel stuck

thanks for the feed back. I wish I could fill you in on all the facts in this situation. there is no sexual or physical abuse. I feel I'm emotionally and financially abused. there r so many things going on in my life that I don't need the added stress. I'm worried about how long I'll b able to work. it's getting harder to do. I work in a very busy deli dept. and since the covid virus it's been busy every day. I'm second shift (which I prefer. not a morning person.) so that means I'm a closer. that means all machines floors and cases have to be cleaned. so far I'm handling it. I'm trying to cut back on hours because I am getting social security but I don't see any way in quiting because I need the income
my employer tries to be helpful but we're always shorthanded. it's a very physical job and a lot of people who get hired end up leaving. I'm 64. and now I'm dealing with trying to figure medicare out. also , my 84 year old mother lives across the street from me. I think I may have mentioned that situation already.my sons who r twins have had a very rough time. in life. they had learning problems in school (ADHD ) they have a hard time sticking to a job. they have been working for someone who. I think takes advantage of them. they have had their own Apts and relationships. they each have a daughter. my granddaughters r wonderfully. I have 2 great granddaughters also. I think I live with guilt about them because I was so young when I had them (19) I begged the school system to help me. they just kept telling me that they were fine. they probably should be on as I. I don't know what to do. I'm so overwhelmed. anyway. I don't know if any of this makes sense to anyone. I got long winded again !
thanks for letting ramble on. karen

If you only have one bedroom and they are not on the lease, then they are not tenants. Especially if not paying u rent. I would tell both its time to find there own place maybe together. One was invited for a short time, the other moved in without permission. Give them a time, like 2 weeks. If they don't leave in that time, then call the police and ask what your options are. How is your landlord. Can he/she help by issuing a letter saying that the two boys need to leave since they are not on the lease? That is without it backfiring on you.

Do you have enough money to put them up in a nice but cheap motel for a week or two? Then they r on their own.

Karen, I'm so sorry for what you're going through.

How old are your sons? Where were they both living before the one had his accident?

It certainly does sound as though they are exploiting the situation, but I doubt if reporting elder abuse (do you even qualify as "an elder"???) is the answer.

Would you consider moving?

You need to evict them. Google "eviction" and the name of your state.

Saying that they are abusing you would be false. They are annoying you and not abiding by house rules. That's not abuse.

Yes, need more info or what abuse you are talking about.

AGree with pp.  Also, sometimes people consider neglect to be abuse, and unless there is a duty to care, there may be nothing to the "abuser", but the authorities may remove the elderly person

Karen, you will need to supply more detail since there are differences between physical, sexual, emotional and financial abuse, and they are all treated and approached differently by different agencies. What is going on in your situation that you are suspecting this? If it's physical or sexual you may have to call 911 or at least call police or APS immediately.