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M
Martz06 Asked August 2020

My father with dementia has decided not to see anymore neurologists...

His primary care physician tried to give him a referral to another neurologist. He told me I’m done with them. I don’t need to see neurologists anymore. I guess I understand the frustration since they had something to do with reporting him to motor vehicle as well as diagnosing him with dementia, and he still doesn’t believe he has dementia but yes he remembers the diagnosis 😞. He also refuses to take medication to slow down his vascular dementia diagnoses, but why take pills if you don’t have it right? I’m just wondering how I am supposed to get him to see the Dr. if he starts becoming angry or violent. He doesn’t trust Dr’s or me. Anyone else have this problem?

AlvaDeer Aug 2020
Quite honestly if there is a doctor out there who has pills that will slow or cure any dementia, I am unaware of it. I understand a doctor wanting to get the stage of what your father and you are dealing with diagnosed to help with all considerations in future, medical and legal. But I think that perhaps this can wait. If this is what you are dealing with, at some point in the future there IS going to be an ER visit of some kind. Ask your doctor if that is not time enough for a further neuro workup and staging. At that point your father will BE there already, transported in by Emergency Services personnel, ambulance, etc. If your doctor say "No, this must be done now" ask him "Why--exactly". Many doctors make a profit off medications they prescribe; people think that this was addressed by law, but it was not. The profit can be as much as 1%-6% of cost of the medication. That I know of there are not medications that cure or slow dementia. There ARE medications that help with relaxation, and a more comfortable patient. Good luck. Hope you'll update us.
If your doctor insists that, for reasons we cannot know, this must be done, then I would tell him flat out that YOU cannot get him there, and that you have no access to help in getting him there, so "now what".
Wishing you good luck.

gladimhere Aug 2020
When my mom received her diagnosis she and her hubby to be stormed out of the doctor's office swearing it was quackery and would never return. Her hubby was very with it but preferred his denial. He managed her care for about four years and never revealed how sick my mom had become. This would have continued had he not required a hip replacement which led to three months in rehab. They did return to the same doc, mom forgot.

Mom's doc never referred her to a neurologist. I asked one day why not? A good gerontologist can and will do anything a neurologist would do. Gerontologists are well educated in all things elderly.

Is dad's doc a geriatric specialist? What is the point of seeing a neurologist? Just more poking and prodding and testing? Why subject him to this very stressful series of tests and meds? Gerontologist will prescribe meds, but be patient even with neurologists finding the right meds is trial and error.

Relax a neurologist can't do anything more tyan a good geriatric doc can. Let it go.

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