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KellyW Asked September 2020

How do I know when it’s time to enact my DPOA and force my 89 year old father with dementia into memory care?

He’s unwilling to move.

Countrymouse Sep 2020
Why do you want to move him into memory care?

It's time to act on the authority that he gave you - never forget that he in his right mind *gave* you this authority - when:

he is no longer able to process and take decisions in his own best interests
AND
those decisions do have to be made.

Are both true now?

Lvnsm1826 Sep 2020
Tell him he's going on a trip or vacation.

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Geaton777 Sep 2020
Agree with JoAnn. Your profile states, "...is 89 years old, living at home with age-related decline, alzheimer's/dementia, anxiety, depression, diabetes, hearing loss, incontinence, and sleep disorder."

That's a lot for someone to manage long-distance. The PoA/caregiving needs to honor what is in his best interests (what he needs) as long as it's not onerous for the PoA/caregiver. You may need to employ "therapeutic fibs" to get him to his new home.

JoAnn29 Sep 2020
Read your POA. It should say effective upon the person being found incompetent to make his/her own decisions. Some will say a Doctor or two is needed to confirm this. If he has been formally diagnosed, get a letter stating this from his doctor. If not, you need to have him evaluated by a neurologist. Then your POA becomes effective. Then its not longer what he wants but what he needs.

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