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M
maryclare Asked October 2020

Dad (94) with last stage dementia is dying. He hasn't had food in a week, only tiny sips of water, and is in pain. Is it time for morphine?

Isthisrealyreal Oct 2020
If he is in pain then yes, it is time to administer the morphine.

This is not like putting an animal down, he is only administered enough to ease his pain.

May God grant you peace and strength during this difficult time.

DennisRice Oct 2020
Peace is hard to find when at this stage as a caregiver, but try and find it in the ways you serve him. I just went through this with my dad who passed on September 3rd so the indecision and emotional strain is still very fresh in my mind. I found peace with the big decisions by resting in the small services. I held his hand, watched him closely, rested with him, stayed up at night when he was awake, and just stayed as close as I could. The morphine decision while important, made lots of sense when needed as I knew his time to transition was at hand and did not want to see pain or agitation steal his last moments with us. He passed with my mom (wife of 63 years), my sister and myself holding his hands and talking with him. The morphine made that possible and I was glad for it.

Use your heart, serve him when you can to know where he is, and have no regrets. I’ll pray for that peace for you.

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AlvaDeer Oct 2020
I am very sorry you are facing this loss. You do not say whether hospice is involved, but I think is Morphine is being discussed it may be. I would let hospice be your guide in whether or not morphine is indicated. It relieves pain, air hunger and also sedates.

ToniFromRVA Oct 2020
First of all I'm sorry that you are going through this. I went through this with my mom in July 2018. She was my best friend & I knew her wishes. She was in late stage Alzheimer's & I ordered hospice. She was not taking her meds & barely eating. She was in CHF & stopped eating. Hospice had gone over the meds to use & why they were important. I started her on the appropriate meds & stayed with her as much as I could. She was not in pain for the past several days of her life until her heart gave out. I was with her for the last hour of her life & gave her love & comfort. I know that's what she would have wanted. As much as I loved her I did not want her to suffer. She passed in my arms & that also gave me comfort. Hospice was my choice. My advice is to search your heart & do what you are comfortable in doing, 🙏

97yroldmom Oct 2020
He should not be in pain. Speak to your hospice medical team.
I am sorry for this difficult time for your family.

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