Mom is 83 and in a senior assisted living facility she recently is cured from back to back UTI infections and now diagnosed with COVID-19, but with a few symptoms. The facility she lives in is telling us we have to find 24 hour care for our mom because they are not equipped to care for her. Where are we supposed to find this person? Mom is also, as of two days ago, on palliative care. Now she is in a wheelchair and weighs 89 pounds. All five of us kids are at a crossroads and don’t know what to do. Mom cannot be left unattended in her apartment in senior living. Does anyone have any experience with the situation? We live in Ohio.
16 Answers
Helpful Newest
First Oldest
First
It doesn't sound like your mom is dealing with any dementia issues, so I probably won't be of much help but, I can tell you what my experience has been.
I moved my mom into assisted living in 2015 when she was diagnosed with Alzheimer's - she was 90 at the time. She had level one care because she was still able to walk, dress herself and eat on her own so I got her a nice one bedroom apartment.
In 2020, I saw her on February 28th when I took her out to lunch, the lockdown was on March 13th in which my husband bought her an iPad so we could keep an "eye" on her since she didn't have a window that was accessible to us. On April 22nd, we got a call from an outside mobile doctor's nurse who said my mom was near death from severe dehydration and had COVID - the facility didn't tell me she was severely ill. Once in the ER and then admitted to an isolated COVID wing in the hospital, they ran further tests which showed she had bi-lateral pneumonia as well as a severe UTI. By now she was 95, amazingly survived and was transferred to a rehab facility for three weeks. She lost 20 pounds, wasn't eating and could no longer walk or dress herself. There was no way I could in good conscience send her back to the ALF even though they had a memory care unit. My husband and I found a new facility with the help of a placement agent - all this during the midst of COVID when little was known about it. We ended up moving her into their memory care wing because now she needed people who were trained in dementia-related diseases and she needed caregivers giving her round-the-clock care. She is also on hospice now so she is seen once a week by their nurse and given showers three times a week. My mom is also in a wheelchair now and got down to a weight of 114 from 145 in March. Right now with being given Ensure Protein Drinks she weights 122.
So maybe you can do what we did and talk to a Placement Agent. I don't know if they charge a fee or not. We didn't have to because we were given her name through the rehab's discharge manager. But, she knew how to navigate and communicate with all types of places which would have taken my husband and I a whole lot longer to do on our own and we were under pressure from the rehab facility who was ready to release her.
Best wishes to you and your family and I hope you will be able to find the right place for your mom!
ADVERTISEMENT
She survived. She remained virus positive for three months, and we didn’t see her for a total of five months.
If you feel she can benefit from remaining in her apartment for the time being, you may have to use an agency for the full time coverage, but at some point if she does recover from her present situation, she may need a higher level of residential care, and I’d start looking for that right now.
In my hotbed location, hospice coverage does not provide full time support, but if you have access to a residential hospice, you may find that that may be a good possibility to consider.
I was through every emotion from A to Z when this happened to us, and I wish I were close enough, and it was safe enough, to give you a huge hug and tell you about some of the other things that happened on our path through it.
Hope you are supporting each other and taking good care of yourselves, too.
I also live in Ohio with a mother in Memory Care Assisted Living, however, this facility has a plan for COVID19 positive residents. I'd contact the Ohio Ombudsmen for help. There are assisted living facilities for those who test positive with or without symptoms. https://ohio.gov/wps/portal/gov/site/residents/resources/office-of-the-state-long-term-care-ombudsman
Also, your local or regional Ohio Department on Aging.
God bless, we are here to support you!
https://budesonideworks.com
What a terrible ordeal you went through with your mom too. How is she doing now?
Do you know what you will be doing since your in the midst of selling the house?
You'll be in my thought and prayers - that you will find a good place/option for your mom!
SNF-skilled nursing facility. Based on your disclosure of your mother, it sounds like she is in need of a higher level of care, thus consider moving her from "assistive" to "skilled nursing"-- meaning instead of sr living, she needs a nursing home and Medicare does cover.
It is time to move her to a facility that can meet her needs. These facilities that want high rent and fulltime caregivers are just worried about keeping their beds full. Find a place that she will receive the appropriate care for her needs.
I personally like board and care homes, but they don't have the activities that large facilities have, so they are not for everyone.
Best of luck finding the best care for your mom.
See All Answers