I recently learned that our local alzheimers association has a voucher program for 2, $500 grants per year and that this can also be paid to any family member, not just a licensed worker. It's for any dementia respite care. it's not much but I'm planning to apply for it. In my case it will go towards an agency helper because I want the respite!
CAREGIVERMD, This is a discussion that you can have with all the family. Do a bit of research in your area how much does a caregiver charge. Use an Agency to determine cost as this would be a "standard rate" for your area. That is what you could "charge" and it would be consistent if you were to have someone come in and help you. And you will need that as time goes on. It was a while ago but I had to hire privately and I paid caregivers $20.00 per hour. This was about what an agency would charge but caregivers working for an agency get no where near that since much of it is "administrative fees" that pay for insurance and all the rest of the "legal" stuff. If you don't "feel right" about charging $20.00 per hour for example would you feel better getting $10.00? If so take the 20 and "bank" what you feel is excess and see how you feel in 6 months or longer. Use it later to either improve your house to make it easier to care for her, take a vacation with the rest of the family. But trust me there will be times that $20.00 per hour will seem like you are vastly underpaid. Also remember that taxes have to be taken out of the money that you will be paid. You need to have all this written down and keep records. If there is ever a need to apply for Medicaid there needs to be documentation that money paid to you or any caregiver has been done legally and it is within reason.
I should also mention that in theory you could "charge" her for rent, part of the utilities, food and all the rest of the household expenses. That is one of the reasons that I mentioned this should be a discussion to have with an Elder Care Attorney.
Being one of many makes it all the more important that she pay for any caregiving, those who do more shouldn't be equal to those who do nothing. What is fair is different for each family, start by investigating what she would be paying outside caregivers (you might be shocked) and then taking her income into consideration - most family members are willing to work for a very small percentage of the true cost.
(Setting up a formal, legal document that details compensation is pretty much a necessity for anyone who is receiving care due to the possibility of the need for medicaid in the future)
How much is a fair amount to ask for a senior on a fixed income. I know she really appreciates all that I do and wants to compensate me for it but I just don't know how to accept her money since I am her daughter. Additionally, I am one of many kids of hers. I don't want to be judged by my siblings if they know I am accepting money from her to "take care for her". On the other side of this, they are not stepping up to help. Torn.
Why should your mom not pay for caregiving? If she has saved her money for her "old age", for her "retirement" this is it. This is what she saved for. She is living with you and she would be paying you. Better than paying $XXX to a facility to care for her. A Caregiver agreement should be in place. Is she competent to agree to conditions in a contract? You might want to discuss with an Elder Care Attorney details for the contract and make sure all the proper paperwork is done. And with the money that she has you can also hire other caregivers that can care for her some of the time. You can not do it all every day. You need a break. At least 1 or 2 days a week is ideal. Bottom line..if she has the funds and you are caring for her she should be paying you.
How much is a fair amount to ask for a senior on a fixed income. I know she really appreciates all that I do and wants to compensate me for it but I just don't know how to accept her money since I am her daughter. Additionally, I am one of many kids of hers. I don't want to be judged by my siblings if they know I am accepting money from her to "take care for her". On the other side of this, they are not stepping up to help. Torn.
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How to Pay for In-Home Care
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Do a bit of research in your area how much does a caregiver charge. Use an Agency to determine cost as this would be a "standard rate" for your area.
That is what you could "charge" and it would be consistent if you were to have someone come in and help you. And you will need that as time goes on.
It was a while ago but I had to hire privately and I paid caregivers $20.00 per hour. This was about what an agency would charge but caregivers working for an agency get no where near that since much of it is "administrative fees" that pay for insurance and all the rest of the "legal" stuff.
If you don't "feel right" about charging $20.00 per hour for example would you feel better getting $10.00? If so take the 20 and "bank" what you feel is excess and see how you feel in 6 months or longer. Use it later to either improve your house to make it easier to care for her, take a vacation with the rest of the family. But trust me there will be times that $20.00 per hour will seem like you are vastly underpaid.
Also remember that taxes have to be taken out of the money that you will be paid.
You need to have all this written down and keep records. If there is ever a need to apply for Medicaid there needs to be documentation that money paid to you or any caregiver has been done legally and it is within reason.
I should also mention that in theory you could "charge" her for rent, part of the utilities, food and all the rest of the household expenses. That is one of the reasons that I mentioned this should be a discussion to have with an Elder Care Attorney.
(Setting up a formal, legal document that details compensation is pretty much a necessity for anyone who is receiving care due to the possibility of the need for medicaid in the future)
If she has saved her money for her "old age", for her "retirement" this is it. This is what she saved for.
She is living with you and she would be paying you. Better than paying $XXX to a facility to care for her.
A Caregiver agreement should be in place.
Is she competent to agree to conditions in a contract?
You might want to discuss with an Elder Care Attorney details for the contract and make sure all the proper paperwork is done.
And with the money that she has you can also hire other caregivers that can care for her some of the time. You can not do it all every day. You need a break. At least 1 or 2 days a week is ideal.
Bottom line..if she has the funds and you are caring for her she should be paying you.