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hugosfan Asked November 2020

Mom's never been away from me. Sis conned her into moving with her & won't give me the address. Mom wants to see me. How do I report to APS?

Can I send them to a sibling that knows where she lives? Someone help me I've never been kept away from my mom. My mom doesn't understand what she's doing.

hugosfan Jan 2021
Mom didn't move in with her. My sister is mean she comes in my house yelling at my mom. She's bossy yellimg at me what I can't do in my house for example smoke in my home. I think she's jealous of our relationship because she's been gone for 20 years and moved back to our location.
NeedHelpWithMom Jan 2021
So are saying that the incident occurred over cigarette smoke?

Or is there more to it? Have you spoken to your mom lately? Or your sister?
Beatty Nov 2020
Yes call APS. Police may get involved to locate Sister & Mother. A welfare check on them hopefully can be done.

The heart of this matter is your elderly Mother's well being.

I hope you & your Sister can sort things out to achieve that.

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haileybug Nov 2020
You stated your mom doesn't understand that she has been "conned" by your sister to moving in with her.

To "Conn" means to "defraud."

Your sis will not give you her address. Why not? What authority does she have to do this? That sounds like holding her against her will.

In my opinion, If she was taken by force (conned) and your sister will not give you the address. I would say that is kidnapping. Unless of course she has some authority which I doubt she does.

With this being said, I would think all this falls into the "police" category.

When my family member (who has dementia) was taken to an unknown location, I called APS.

APS told me to call the police. The police is the one who located my LO.

Hope you find your mom.
NeedHelpWithMom Nov 2020
That’s what I was wondering. What prompted all of this? Why? There has to be a reason for this behavior. It’s unusual. Unless, her sister is plain mean or has a mental illness.
NeedHelpWithMom Nov 2020
These situations really make us wonder what goes through people’s minds, right?

It’s very disturbing.
AlvaDeer Nov 2020
So true, and which entity will help with this kind of depends. There is so much "missing" here. For instance, our OP says that Mom was "conned" into moving. How does she know this. She says she has no idea where sister lives? There is a whole lot missing in our information I am afraid, but that is on APS to sort. And whomever might help, Police or APS, one or the other will point our OP in the right direction. Hope OP comes back to tell where all this stands.
worriedinCali Nov 2020
APS will absolutely help you with this. They will be more helpful than the police especially since you don’t know where your mother is.

haileybug Nov 2020
APS is not going to help you with this. You are going to need to report to the police.

If your mom may be held against her will.

AlvaDeer Nov 2020
If you cannot find APS in your area, try to use your computer search engine to look it up. For instance, Google "Adult Protective Services in Barry County".
If you still cannot fine it, stop by your local police station, or call it to get access.
I cannot think that this came "out of the blue", and wonder what the relations have been with you, Mom and your Sister.
You may need family mediation with a disinterested party. Some folks to check out would be:
Mediate.com
APFMnet.org (Academy of Professional Family mediators)
ACRnet.org (Assn for Conflict Resolution.
Good luck.
NeedHelpWithMom Nov 2020
Great information, Alva. Thanks for sharing!
Countrymouse Nov 2020
Ring APS and ask them. Even if they can't intervene directly they should still be able to give you advice about your options. It is your mother's right to continue a relationship with all of her children (unless there is a very good reason why not, and it would have to be for her protection) so I would expect APS to take your concerns seriously.

You should be able to find your local APS contact details online, but let us know if you're having difficulty and we'll try to help.

NeedHelpWithMom Nov 2020
I’m so sorry. Do you have any inkling why she is doing this?

I suppose you could ask for a wellness check in for her before an investigation.

Can you speak to her on the phone? What has your sister told you? Do you speak to her?

Very sad situation.

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