What can I do with my brother's boyfriend that is harassing me?

Just a suggestion, is there anyway to have an adult mtg maybe with a mediator of some kind? A neutral party to sort out the needs of your father and who will do what. Can extra sitter time be scheduled?
If BF does not want to participate maybe its time for him to move out.

if ur his POA than you give him a 30 day notice to move out asap. you would have to go to court and explain the issue. get u an order of protection and out he will be in a few mths. take pics of everything in the home just in case he has sticky fingers and do not accept rent. he maybe abusive to ur father as well. get him out asap. i believe it will take 3/6 mths. you can do it urself or hire an attorney depending on how fast u want him out. u nor your family have to deal with this nonsense. you can file a law suit for defamation if that's the case.

I rarely think a lawyer is needed. Lawyers can sometimes help with personal or relationship problems, but usually not. In your case, however, I'd say it's lawyer time, especially if your father has any assets. Maybe something is going on this guy wants to cover up.

Who owns the home your Father is living in?

I'm wondering is the boyfriend is a freeloader?

Unfortunately, the boyfriend's lack of decency & petty rubbish on Fbook is not within your control, unless it is abuse that it is against the law.

Can you discuss his behaviour directly with him? Or failing that, with your Brother (privately)?

Maybe boyfriend feels like he does all the work & you waltz in just for the occasional appointment? Who knows unless he TALKS, not just act out. Can he be an ADULT & tell you or your Brother what's eating him? That would be a start.

So, you are POA and per previous post you do not live in the same town as your father and your brother and BF live in the home with your father. So, what are the needs of your father? What is the harassment?

This is the "harassing" email I sent to a decision maker, personal and work:

"Per the messages I left on your voicemail, your mother fell and refuses to use her lifeline. She is on the floor and due to past abuse accusations by you, I refuse to get her off the floor. As you state, she has choices and her choice is not to push the button.

I have had to care for her last few weeks without aides because you have not fulfilled your duty as POA in making sure she has help after her agency closed. This is not my responsibility. M is asking me to is not an excuse even though according to your mom it is.

Furthermore, you have not seen or bought your mother diapers, food, supplies in four months. As that is another of your responsibilities you have thrust on me. Attached are receipts for reimbursement.

Please feel free to swing by at your earliest convience to get your mother off the floor. Please use the side door since only wanted guests should come in the front. The trash is on the side.

Stacy"

Just saying, no one should blame BF when he lives in the home and we do not know what the harassment is. Picking up prescriptions and finances are not the same as being in the home taking care of an elder.

You need to get brother to agree he doesn't want the man there anymore. Then Dad will need to evict him legally because he is a tenant. If Dad is not able to do this, then hopefully someone has POA. If the man ever lays hands on you, Dad or brother call the police. Tell them he can't return and if he does its with a police escort to pick up his belongings.

When it comes down to it though, its up to your brother to kick him out. I would not go over without my husband.
You also posted this:
https://www.agingcare.com/questions/my-brothers-partner-is-starting-to-harass-me-should-i-involve-my-83-yr-old-father-in-the-situation-461634.htm

Why don't you offer to let this man and your brother take over dad's care, 24/7?

YOU shouldn't be accepting abuse while caregiving.

Talk to brother, if he doesn't put you ahead of his BF, then that is telling. This is wrong, on a lot of levels. You shouldn't have to deal with the BF AT ALL. You're not related, I don't even consider myself related to my MIL and I am married to her son.

If you are POA, you can call Elder Abuse--YOU! (I am assuming you are in your 50's to 60's) Does your dad have his wits about him enough to help out with sticking up for yourself?

As far as FB harassing, that's just juvenile.

Can you have dad give POA to brother? Wash your hands of it? Sounds like you do care for dad, you're just upset with brother. But this BF is making it unpleasant to do your CG.

There probably isn't even a REASON the BF is a jerk. Some people are just mean.

I'm so sorry for your situation.