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Maddkattier Asked November 2020

It's been 2 months since my client has taken a shower! I'm only an aide and can not force her, do I call my boss?

I am a home health care aide to dementia client in her 80's She comes up with every excuse including that I don't sleep there so she takes it at night. Her son points out he's there at night and knows she hasn't. Should I call my company or should he to possibly get a nurse in to probably force her? Her state caseworker was of no help. It's "not in her department" ????? What? Anyway she only said now to watch for a state caseworker to show up from time to time. Ok will they take her away for not showering? Otherwise everything is clean, there's food, She is no way neglected it's she depressed and doesn't care! She won't shower!!

JoAnn29 Nov 2020
No one can force an adult to do what they don't want to even with a Dementia. My daughter was an LPN. She said you need to make them feel it was their decision.

Example: Mrs S wouldn't you love to feel clean and fresh. Have fresh clothes put on.

I also think asking is not good. My Mom suffered from a Dementia. When asked to do something she always said No. So I didn't ask. I would say "Time for a bath" If she said she didn't want one I would say " but you will stink" then she took it. Not sure if you can tell a client they stink, though. Maybe the son could though. "Mom I think you need to get that aide to give you a good shower, u stink" 😊

At 80, falling in a shower maybe why she doesn't want to get one. Is her tub/shower safe? Are there bars, a shower chair, hand held shower chair? If not, I would have the son purchase them. (Medicare, unless changed in last 9 years, does not pay for shower chairs) You can get temporary suction bars. Is the bathroom warm. If not, use a portable heater to warm it up.

There are dry shampoos. Wipes too.

funkygrandma59 Nov 2020
I'm not clear as to why you haven't mentioned it to your boss already. Why has it taken 2 months? Of course they need to be made aware of what's going on with your client. That should have been done a month ago or so. I'm hoping you are at least using the body wipes to clean her and the rinse-free shampoo caps to wash her hair. That is certainly better than nothing.

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gladimhere Nov 2020
It would be unlawful to force her to shower. Yes, you should tell the employer of this difficulty. There may be someone on staff that has a knack for getting this done.

Those with dementia, regardless of the type, often will refuse to bathe. They are afraid of the water, and it may actually hurt when the water hits them. A bath may be less frightening. Maybe adding a handheld fixture in the bath would help.

Shane1124 Nov 2020
Yes I would bring this to the attention of your supervisor. They may have some tricks up their sleeve to resolve this particular situation. It should be noted on the clients care plan.

My mother refused to shower or bathe for about 2 years and I feel your frustration. But as a resident they can refuse and you can’t force them.

I tried sponge baths and helped my mother reach, rinse, etc. To me it was never enough but some cleaning is better than none. It also depended on my mom’s mood.

I’d enlist the help of your supervisor who could maybe contact the family for support or find another solution.

Stacy0122 Nov 2020
Your company should be aware of the situation but you cannot force the client to bathe. She has the right to refuse.

Many older people lose depth perception which is a reason they will not bathe. Your company can work with the state caseworker to get proper equipment in place and the son could purchase a bright bath mat and tub decals to help with this.

Countrymouse Nov 2020
Nobody should (or will) "force" your client to take a shower. There are many different approaches you can try to encourage her to shower (or bathe?), but as you say her hygiene and personal care are fine there's no particular reason why it has to be a shower, period.

What's puzzling me is how come your company isn't already aware of her routine - don't you write up every visit anyway?

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