Find Senior Care (City or Zip)
Join Now Log In
C
CareGiver1437 Asked December 2020

My husband had his gallbladder removed Valentine's Day, 2013. He got a bacterial infection that impacted his brain. How can I help him?

Since then it has been horror trying to find anyone who could help him. I have gone through all of the western medical professionals; alternative healers, and even resorted to shamans and the like. No one knows what happened to him. He does not want to see or talk with anyone. He is in a private home and he gets with encouragement from the caregivers for meals, to shower and then goes back to bed. He refuses physical therapy or any therapy. He won't listen to music - he turns it off. No TV. No DVD's. Refuses to have a therapy pet visit. He will take supplements and meds. He will eat his meals. I have tried to introduce art in multiple ways- puzzles, had artists paint him beautiful paintings for his room; shared pictures of us from the past; and gone to homeopaths for remedies. Once a homeopath brought him out for 2 days, but it did not hold and he regressed. I am open to anything... ??

GardenArtist Dec 2020
Has he seen a neurologist, and/or has anyone provided more information on the infection?    How was he treated for it?

CareGiver1437 Dec 2020
Thank you. Yes, I am praying and working on releasing him while providing the best care possible. I get pulled between feeling I could do more; not knowing if he has the capacity to chose and trusting he is doing what he wants. .

ADVERTISEMENT


AnnReid Dec 2020
Professional Music Therapy is a very specific, structured approach using experiences with sound to reach people with many neurological/psychological symptoms.

REAL Music Therapy MUST be administered by trained specialists, but many countries have active practitioners and/or university level training programs where trained, credentialed therapists can be accessed.

ALL Music Therapists MUST be certified in that field. Other therapists may use music in passive ways but Music Therapy is very specific. The fact that he doesn’t want casual music in his environment does NOT necessarily indicate that a Music Therapy assessment wouldn’t be useful.

You a courageous person. He is lucky to have you.
CareGiver1437 Dec 2020
Thank you, yes tried -- he refuses to have the therapist in his room :(
polarbear Dec 2020
Caregiver - I read your profile and saw that your husband suffers anxiety, arthritis, depression, incontinence, and mobility problems, in addition to the gallbladder removal and the brain infection you mentioned in the subject line. That is a lot of problems.

How old is your husband? Seems to me he still knows what he wants and doesn't want. And he doesn't want to be bothered; he just wants to eat and sleep.

I tried imagining myself in your shoes, and I can see how difficult and frustrating it is for you to see your husband like that as you have tried everything and nothing worked. You obviously care and love him very much. With all his medical problems, he doesn't have the strength and will to be up and enjoying life the way you want him to.

Do you think just maybe he is content enough to just eat and sleep? I know it is not enough for you, but maybe, just maybe, it is enough for him?

ADVERTISEMENT

Ask a Question

Subscribe to
Our Newsletter