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dianajustdiana Asked December 2020

I am the oldest of 4 caring for my mother. I have put in approximately 70 hours a week, this started in October. How do I get paid for this?

My sisters are upset that I would like to be paid not a lot 250-300 a week my younger sister gets 2000 mo for less work. I give her a bath, cook, clean, take mom anywhere she needs to go and spend my own money on groceries. I take care of the pool and maintain the yard. I am there from 8 to 15 hours every day. How can I get compensated for my work? I'm burning out. My youngest sister is the POA but lives in TX, we live in California. Help, what can I do?

worriedinCali Dec 2020
Your parents need to compensate you. Bottom line it’s their responsibility here. Even if they are low income and qualify both medically and financially for IHSS which is a state program, you wouldn’t be paid to do anything other than provide hands on care/help with ADLs, preparing meals and taking mom to drs appointments. Pay is minimum wage and you would probably only be given 15-20 hours a week IF that.

AlvaDeer Dec 2020
If parents can afford this care, and are paying one sister, then they should pay all equally, by the hour, and by care plan with their attorney. Payment to children should be reported on their IRS and taxes. You shouldn't be paying your own money for groceries ever. If this can't be worked out equally then don't participate at all. Let others know that is your intention now. It is important this be done legally and meticulous records kept so that this isn't considered to be gifting, due to future needs. If your parents also live in California, medicaid lookback will need 2 1/2 years free of anything that looks like "gifting". The POA can live anywhere she likes. If she is in charge of care plan and such with payments to those doing the work she can go to a lawyer to work out how to keep records, and use parent's funds to make this visit as she is doing business of the estate. As POA she must keep meticulous records. This can be done from any locale. Good luck.

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PeggySue2020 Dec 2020
The going rates for what you're doing:

$20-$25 for "inside needs" (i.e. bathing, toileting, feeding, cooking, assistance ambulating, cleaning out cat box) and trips to the store or doctor.

$100/visit for pool maintenance/cleaning.

$350/month for "mow and go" gardening (typically, no trees, no sprinkler maintenance, no pruning, no leaf pickup). Getting those things requires separate contracts starting at about $25/hour.

$150/week for professional housekeeping (vacuuming, scrubbing tub and tiles, etc.)

No one can live on air, and in California no one can live on $300/week either.

Look up the minimum wage where you are and add $4 to it. That's at minimum what you should be paid and what ILs are paying their night/weekend aide. She'll make over $100K annualized.
MJ1929 Dec 2020
Wow-- I don't know where you live, but there's no way a "mow and go" gardener should get $350/month unless they're doing actual acreage. I pay my mom's gardener $110 (and in a wealthy So Cal community).

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