Husband has cancer, severe HF and diabetes. He sleeps a lot. I have been waking him up for meals. Should I do this? He was in the hospital.

Is your husband on Hospice, if not you may want to consider it. There are advantages, they supply his depends if he uses them. He may be taken off some of his meds. Morphine used for pain and ease of breathing. The meds he is on will be covered by Medicare as will depends and other things used for his care. A nurse will check in about 3x a week but must be available to you 24/7. An aide for bathing about 3x a week. With homecare, though, family is responsible for care 24/7. You take advantage of getting away when the aide is there. You can ask, in advance for extra time to run an errand, etc. If you go the way of Hospice, please have someone there with you when they explain what they do. Too many posts have been where family doesn't understand how in home hospice works and what rights the client has. You have a right to ask that they don't come early in the mornings, lets say. But, you need to be willing to compromise because they have other clients.

There are good and bad Hospice agencies but they all have to adhere to Medicare criteria because that is who is footing the bill. You can change hospice providers if you r not satisfied with a certain one. The one complaint on this forum is the use of morphine. Please make sure you understand how it is used. One poster said her Father refused it saying he didn't need it but the nurse gave it to him anyway. The client is in charge of his care, I feel. If he is competent to make a decision concerning his care, than he should be allowed to make it. So many people have the wrong info when it comes to Hospice. You don't have to die within 6 months. Criteria concerning that was changes years back. They don't kill a person with morphine or allow no food or water unless the person is actively dying. You do have control over the situation. If you see something u don't understand, question. If youvdon't like the answer, call the supervisor.

There is no reason not to waken him for meals, a bit of visiting, a bit of exercise if he is able, for bathing. To get up in the chair for a bit is good for his breathing and circulation while he is able to do it. And especially if he has good appetite, it is important he is awakened for meals. You have not said that he has no interest in food. Your husband was in hospital? Is he improved? Is he on Hospice? Whether or not you awaken him for meals depend more upon what HE wants, at this point, than anything else. Hope you can tell us a bit more about his current condition and how you both are doing.

If he eats when you wake him, then by all means wake him. He needs nourishment. If there comes a time when he says he doesn't want to eat, then I wouldn't force him, as that might mean his body is preparing for his final journey.