My mom is accusing me of financial abuse even though she said it was ok to use her bank account. How should I handle this?

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I am with XenaJada in not believing this is a real letter. We are encouraged on Forum to maintain an accepting attitude. So I am going to accept all you said as the truth. My advice would be that you may be coming into a world of Orange being the new Black. I would get a good Lawyer and come up with a better story if you hope to avoid prosecution. Surely there is nothing you have done here that you consider to be "the right thing" to do?
I will be reporting my own comment here so that admins can review this post and see if they consider it to be possible trolling.

"I do use it for online gambling and now I am being investigated."

So, IF this letter is indeed real, then you SHOULD be investigated. That account is for your mother's needs. Is she in a nursing home now?

How much of your mother's money have you used for on-line gambling? I hope for your sake it's under $10,000. Anything above that is considered grand theft in most states and is a felony. You would do well to speak to a criminal defense lawyer because you're going to need one.
Never use someone else's bank account or credit card (especially a senior in social security) for on-line gambling. Did it not occur to you that if your mom has dementia she won't remember giving you permission to use her bank account? You need a POA which is how a person who has to be in charge of the finances of an elder or someone who is mentally incapable protects themselves from accusations and the forgetting that comes with dementia.
If you were planning on using your mother's money in such nefarious ways it would have been wise to make some cash withdraws from her account in the form of "rent" then deposit into your own account and use your own. Talk to a criminal defense lawyer because you're going to need one. Also, don't pay the lawyer's retainer out of your mom's account. That will look really bad for you.

Lora, I think you should prepare yourself for a serious investigation; not trying to scare you but warn you. Unless you were doing dark web cryptocurrency stuff for front running online gambling outside of the US, there is going to be a quite visible trail as there will be tax reporting forms filed. The bank accounts that $ was pulled from can be easily found and that the $ was coming from an account(s) tied to her SS# mom will flat just be there. You have no written notarized documents that she authorized this and that you were placing orders on her behalf. It seriously looks bad.

That she has dementia and is interdependent on you (as she lives in a home that you are owner of so you control her environment) will likely place her on the category of “vulnerable adult” for APS. If her Parkinson’s is at the point she is not self-ambulatory so she needs others to help her transition from bed to potty or from bed to a chair, that too places her into “vulnerable adult”. Actions done again vulnerable adult can have criminal charges filed. If you right now know that this is where things are going, get yourself a criminal defense atty and STAT. Also I’d suggest that you do a detailed spread sheet on all the $ you took & to the penny. & do a cashiers check for the full amount or at least 50% and put in her acct ASAP. It’s a good faith step. APS take stuff like this seriously and often file for emergency ward of the state action on the vulnerable adult so the court appoints an outside guardian or suitable family member who takes over her financials and all decision making under court supervision. This is all serious stuff.

Got to ask, just whats the situation on the bank account that mom gets her SS check or any other retirement? Like is it this account you took the $ from for gambling? Or is the SS$ deposit account another bank account? Did you take any $ from it as well? &/or is it being at all commmingled to pay house & whatever else of your expenses?

As shes living w you, it’s reasonable for her to pay for some housing costs. But it needs to be defined and consistent as to how paid. If you took $ as needed, no pattern, no direct relation to a bill, that’s also gonna be an issue for APS. By defined, I mean her living space is 30% of the sq footage, so it makes sense for her to pay 30% of water bill, electric Bill. Perhaps She pays 30% of grocery bills. Or she pays you a set “rent” each mo for room & board. There’s a pattern of spending that makes sense and has a direct relation to her living situation. Comprende?

& as a final note, if you were at all doing any dark web online gambling that is foreign based, it’s likely illegal in the US. If you got a W2-G last month or this week from whomever you placed $ with then their legal (like BoDog, they are legit). But if you didn’t, they are probably sketchy as hell imo. The APS investigation usually lets tax authorities (IRS) know if they find things. Really ask around to find a white collar criminal defense guy & soon.

Thank you for all the feedback. I know it was wrong and I will take whatever is coming I take full responsibility for what I did.

You lawyer up and do not cooperate until you speak to a lawyer. If it more than $1k in most states, $500 in others, it would be a felony.

You're in deep trouble. Without any legal paperwork showing she gave you permission to use her account -- namely, she should have put you on the account -- you are guilty of theft and likely abuse of an elder as well. Ignorance of the proper way to have handled this won't do much good either, and having used the account for gambling is particularly damning.

As againx100 wrote, the best thing you can do is to cooperate fully with the investigation.

Well, this sounds like a mess. I guess the best thing to do is fully cooperate with the investigation. I'm sure they will want you to pay back money, especially if she is on gov't assistance now. You might need some representation. Was she paying market value rent on the other side of your house? And for her own utilities, food, etc.? This can all be documented to figure out what if anything of her money you were actually entitled to. Birthday and Christmas gifts, etc?

Funds should not be co-mingled. Get your own account for gambling. That is not going to look good in an investigation.

I don't have the answers you are looking for, but even though your mom gave you permission to use her bank account, it should have been used for her needs, and her needs alone. Not for your online gambling addiction. That to me is elder abuse, when someone takes advantage of an incapacitated elder, for their own gain. I can only guess that in this situation, you will be reaping what you have sown.