What is the best combo of diapers and pads for men’s incontinence?

I'am a older male became incontinent several yrs ago.We my wife and I went with diapers and pants over them to keep things dry.The bed we use a mattress protector plus a pad on my side.

We tried different briefs too. Our best bet was more frequent trips to get changed. My dad became in continent and wasn’t aware when he was wet or dirty. The best thing we invested in were large washable pads we used on his bed, recliner and wheelchair. They come in various sizes. We got 4’ x 5’ for his bed. Helped tremendously! Yes we had to wash several, but it protected his bedding and he wasn’t feeling bad about having wet the bed again. They’re a tad $$$, but last for a long time and help preserve dignity! Use A &D ointment to protect his bum from any sort of skin breakdown. Thankfully with all the wet and dirty briefs (we called them), he never once got a bedsore. Good luck!

First, buy a bedside commode, along with plastic liners, and have it within a foot of the bed. Also buy several urinals with lids and keep these on the bedside table. 
Use quilted pads with plastic on one side (available at CVS, most drugstores, and Amazon). The largest size should be put on sideways right beneath the patient's hips and be UNDER the bottom sheet, hanging down over the side of the mattress about six inches to protect both the top and side of the mattress. Another one should be under the patient's hips but on TOP of the bottom sheet. If one or both get wet, it's fairly easy to take them off and wash them, but you'll need at least four pads so there's always a new one ready.

Then follow the advice of some people who have already commented and experiment with various adult diapers, etc. to find the best combination. I found diapers to be far better than pull-ups because they hold more. This is especially important at night.

If the patient is always in bed, it might be wise to dispense with pajama bottoms and let him only wear the diapers. Fewer layers mean less to wash, assuming that he's still warm enough with only the bed covers.

Have him checked for a urinary infection (extremely common among older people). Remind him to try to use the urinal every hour or so. Limit all fluids several hours before bedtime so you'll be changing bed linens less often at night.

This, too, shall pass. Incontinence presents one of the more difficult aspects of caregiving. I used to do at least six loads of laundry every single day for months on end. It completely wore out the washing machine, which finally broke about two weeks after my loved one died. But just do the best you can.

Is he able to get up, stand up or walk? If yes to any of those questions, then I would recommend getting him up on a regular schedule(every 2 hours) to use the toilet, bedside commode, or urinal. If he's not able to do the above, then perhaps whoever is caring for him can at least hold the urinal for him, so he can go more often in that instead of his diapers. Continually getting soaked in one's own pee, can be very damaging to their skin, and that in itself creates a whole other issue. My husband after having to wear Depends and a men's pad inside that, and still wanting to get up every hour(and I mean every hour) to go to the bathroom to pee, ended up having to get a supra pubic catheter put in. That was really a Godsend, as it allowed us both to be able to get a good night's sleep, and I didn't have to worry about him getting up all the time(as he was a fall risk). Best wishes in getting this figured out.

We use Depend maximum absorbency with a product called Guards (also from Depend). The Guards are like a very thick sanitary napkin with an adhesive backing). I just sick the Guard inside the pull up. On the days my DH takes his diuretic, we have to use both, as his urge to urinate is instantaneous and he literally has no control. I hope this info is helpful

Costco has some inexpensive puppy training pads. They are very durable and really keep the bed and furniture clean and dry.

The Kirkland brand pads with the puppies on the box say they can be used for human incontinence to protect beds and furniture. Sometimes they will barely stick to the skin but there is no residue left on the body and hasn’t caused any irritation.

Depends brand "briefs" with tabs (they're actual diapers) with an infant-sized baby diaper cut down and used as a liner in it.
I did this for a care client I had who was totally incontinent.
Baby diapers are made differently then adult ones are. You do try this and his bedding will be dry as a bone even overnight.

Quickchange incontinence wraps were a godsend for us. They hold more than Depends. Wrap it in thirds around the penis and then put Depends on top for a dry night.
Also, try waterproof sofa bed mattress pads. They don't have the extra fabric for the sides, just elastic. They are bigger, cheaper, and can be laundered daily.

I used 3x5 size bed pads, one side is vinyl and the other is cloth quilted. It's pretty large and place it under him. But, it means more laundry.