Caregiver bringing her children along. How do I tell her to leave her kids at home?

Please come back and tell us how you handled this. We learn from each other.

We had the same problem with one of the caregivers.
It started as an "unexpected problem arose" then evolved into an everyday matter. We asked her not to
bring her 3 and 5 year olds along. Stopped for a while; then started up again plus they were high energy kids
and my MIL was a frail 92 year old. Terminated the care-giver for that and many other little problems.

My husband's caregiver has an adopted 6 year old boy. He attends school next door to our residence. He gets out of school at 2:30 and she works till 3pm. Everyday she, my husband and the dog walk to the school to pick up the boy and walk home.
He sits at the counter and eats his after school snack until she finishes up.
During the week of snow we had in Feb, she had no electricity for the week. I insisted that her family come stay in our house until her electricity came back
My husband enjoyed the company. Her older son sat and watched movies with my husband; her fiancé cleared a bunch of fallen branches, and she and I carried on as usual. Her 6 year old kept my husband entertained with his dinosaurs and hot cars
It's a personal choice how you treat your caregiver. Ours has become a family member. She and I will remain in touch after my husband has to go into MC.

You don't have to apologize. You're the employer. Simply state the reality: You do good work. However, in the future, please leave the children home or I'll need to find someone else.

“You have lovely children and I’m going to ask you to not bring them to my home when you’re on duty. It causes me more stress than it’s worth. If you’re not able to do so, I’m going to have to find another caregiver.”

I didn’t read all of the responses so forgive me if you addressed this already.

Did she ask before bringing her children?

Personally, I don’t think she should even consider asking to bring her children to work with her. Nor, should she put you on the spot without asking and just showing up with the children.

She has to realize that children should not be taken to her job.

Tell her not to bring them in the future. She will have to find childcare or you will have to hire another caregiver.

Certainly, Covid has made everything more difficult for mothers to continue on in their work routine.

Long before Covid though, some people have tried to take advantage of others in one way or another.

I never allowed babysitters to have their boyfriend present when they sat with my kids. I find that ridiculous too.

When I ran a babysitting agency a few years ago, we had a hard rule: the sitters were NOT to bring their children along to the clients' homes, period. You would think this should go without saying, but apparently it doesn't, and has to be discussed up front.

It's totally unacceptable for your CG to bring ANY of her children along to her place of employment, never mind 3 of them! Speak to her right away and if she quits, so be it. The fact that she's doing such a thing without prior approval is what's most bothersome to me. What else is doing without your approval, I wonder?

Good luck!

Just kindly tell her that your home is a workplace and not a place for children. This kind of what I call - creating a bad employee. The first time you overlook an infraction, it becomes ok to do it again.

Be sure to start the conversation with how much you like her and the work she does. If she gets mad, she gets mad. You can't do anything about that. If you have to find a new caregiver, just remember to discuss this at the hiring process.

The caregiver bringing their children to work is totally inappropriate and unprofessional.  This isn't a family member trying to help out, this is a paid professional coming to work.  Her children should not be with her.  Stop accepting her actions immediately.  If you like the care she provides and would like to give her the opportunity to "right her wrong", tell her in no uncertain terms that she cannot bring her children to work or she will be replaced.

As you said:
"LEAVE YOUR KIDS AT HOME"

Otherwise, this working relationship won't work.
And, there are liability issues. What if the kid(s) fall, get hurt. This is on you legally. Immediately start looking for someone else as a back-up. Just in case you need to replace her.