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jedinavia02 Asked May 2021

How can I go about getting my grandmother out of a residential living household when she is completely sound of mind?

I have been living with my great grandmother and her daughter ( my grandmother) and my grandma, her daughter, sorry if it gets confusing, is an alcoholic and the family wanted to move my great-grandmother into a residential living facility because my grandma cannot take care of her with her addiction problems I have been living there and doing a great job helping my great-grandmother, she raised me since I was a toddler and she is basically my mother in my eyes. I love her very much, but her children don't like her very much because they had a difficult childhood with her. Long story short they now have put her into a residential home without consoling her. She hates it and wants me to rescue her, I want to so badly and get an apartment just me and her. She is healthy and has a great memory but my family insists that she's "losing it" and does not retain information. Well I can tell you she most definitely does, she just forgets little things from time to time from boredom. But when I moved in she regained alot of memory because I kept her mind working and not just letting her watch tv all day. Her other daughter (my aunt) is her power of attorney and the one that made her go into the home. My family would be completely against me taking her and getting an apartment with her (it would have to be in her name or she would have to co-sign for me as my credit is not the best at the moment) but my grandma wants to move with me so bad. She's old and doesn't want to be there, is there any way I can take her out and get an apartment with her without telling the family ? Are there legal actions that would stop us? She also wants to change her power of attorney to me and not her daughter, as I said she is totally cognitive and healthy besides the occasional UTI.
I just want her to live a happy life and for her to make her own decisions without the family getting involved.

AlvaDeer May 2021
I don't know how old you are, but you describe yourself as living with these folks, so I doubt that you have the 10,000 or so it would take for you to fight for guardianship of your great-grandmother. If your great grandmother is indeed of competent mind, then you could get your own apartment and she could move with you (IF she is of sound mind and could be tested to be of sound mind). She could then move into her own place, or your place. The family would almost certain go immediately to the court to ask for conservatorship or for guardianship over your great-grandmother, and they would likely win if she could not prove she is of sound mind.
However, and this is the larger point. We all have "jobs" at certain points in life and yours should not be to be in the care of your grandmother. Were she of completely soundmind she could move out of the residential care facility today. They are not prisons. But your job is now to leave the nest and get wings to fly, to continue your education, to get a job, to get your own place, and friends. To eventually have your own family if that is what you wish.
You again don't give us the age of Great-grandmother. But for her to move back into the chaos of an alcoholic child's home, your grandmothers, won't be good for her, and truth is she is not going to get younger and stronger of mind and body. Do step out, step away, and begin on your own journey in life. And you are very kind to care so deeply about your great-grandmother. I hope you visit her often.

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