How to live in a different state than a parent in assisted living?

thank goodness for Amazon… costco now has instacart… my mom buys her depends , TP , poise pads with her costco credit card. I buy everything else on Amazon. Put everything on autopay, newspaper etc… that way you only have to pay the CC and make sure enough money in checking to autopay that as well. The AL needs to have a dr or NP coming in. Hair salon as well. Plus transportation to other appointments. I do it all alone . My mom refused to move here when I had an apartment set up for low income seniors. When she finally said she would move to AL , I jumped on it .. in Arizona. I’m in the Midwest. She will be 90 in October. It’s been difficult yes… but it can be done. My mom now wants to move here, but her health conditions frightens me to move her .

take copies of all credit cards front and back, Drivers license, Medicare card, social security card. Set up accounts with your email address , cell phone number. I’ve had to get into, life insurance , dmv, Medicare , dr portals, life insurance etc…anything that your mom has, make sure you have access .. my mom can’t hear , it does no good for my mom to try to straighten anything out…

keep receipts of anything you take payment for. As there is a 5 year look back for Medicaid.
everything you do keep in mind the Medicaid Rules in case your mom would ever need to use it.

make sure DNR is in place.
check for durable financial POA and mPOA.
keep original will and poa stuff with you.

I keep a small notebook with all passwords , log in information /copies of CC etc
along with doctors and clinics

get a name of a good in home care company you can call if your mom needs to go to a specialist. AL should have a number as well. My mom has to have an endoscopy done in a week and a half. Prior care company will take her, stay with her and return her to AL .

i also have needed my grandparents maiden names for things .

just be thorough, it can be done. Amazon has been a life saver…

I have been caring for my mother out of state goiing on our 11th year. Don't know what answer you are looking for but to be honest it has not been easy but her other kids live in the same state she does and I did not want to move her over here to where I live. Siblings do not help so everything has been up to me. She gets good care in assisted living eventhough she fought it tooth and nail as she does on everything. When she was living in her house before assisted living was pure hell. I call her every three days and if something happens the facility will call you. We do have a really good friend that helps me with momma over there. Couldn't do it all from out of state without her. Hubby and I try to go see her once a month. The covid restricted us but we can see her now. Good luck and take care.